Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

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Gog
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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Tue Jul 04, 2017 11:37 pm

Kanassa wrote:
Gog wrote:
Kanassa wrote: Actually, to make sure I conveyed it right: Could you please tell me how you interpreted the chapter?
Well reading through the chapter, its Trunks struggling with the responsibilities, and fears of the past.
And coming to the conclusion that after he makes sure the earth is safe, he should 'leave the planet alone'
Ah, sorry didn't catch that last part. Thanks! :D

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Tue Jul 04, 2017 11:40 pm

Gog wrote:
Kanassa wrote:
Gog wrote:
Well reading through the chapter, its Trunks struggling with the responsibilities, and fears of the past.
And coming to the conclusion that after he makes sure the earth is safe, he should 'leave the planet alone'
Ah, sorry didn't catch that last part. Thanks! :D
Well, next chapter is 16 and Bulma, so it should less... Depressing. Leave Pan and the others to worry about Trunks's deteriorating mental state :D
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Fri Jul 14, 2017 12:54 am

Chapter 20: Under Metal Flesh

[spoiler]“Check #23, the forest south west of Korin Tower. Bring the map up on screen” The tone of the Capsule Corp Heiress was almost robotic whenever she made an order, her eyes not moving from the computer screen as her fingers danced along the keyboard that balanced on her knee, a pen hanging loosely from her mouth. Behind her the Pilaf trio moved around the much brighter lit lab, Pilaf registering the data feeding through the other screen down on a note pad, while Mai and Shu dashed around him to perform the heavy lifting. A computer here, a pipe there, a chair pushed to JUST the right height. All tending to Bulma’s convenience.

The screen flashed for a second before the image of map popped into view, a whole diagram of Earths many islands that spanned to the limits of the screen. With a few commands typed into the input on Pilaf’s end, the map shifted towards the more dark green cluster of islands in the north-west corner of the map, before dragging it’s view closer to zoom in. Pulling into view a more detailed map of a dense area, a few small villages surrounded by a thick sea of green, before opening up to a large open field.

“What are we even looking for?” The small emperor-in-the-making grumbled as the screen zoomed in on the field, revealing a clean view of what looked to be a ruin of sorts. There were crashed planes, structures crumbled to a few broken bricks, and towers split in half and turned on their sides. “This place is a dump, why would a mad scientist keep his lab here?”

“It was the location of Red Ribbon Headquarters back before Goku turned it into rubble. I guess Gero was feeling nostalgic when he scouted locations for his safe houses” The woman bluntly explained, reaching into her open draw, and pulling out a large roll of a blue print, which she quickly chucked over to Pilaf. “Just start up the scanner and look for any traces of structures that match the blueprints”

It had been five hours since Bulma found the time to start her in depth search for any trace of new androids, dusting off the old record of data she had recovered from the last time they sought out Gero’s labs. Looking for anything that could have survived her son’s destructive visits to the sites. Gero had compiled a very organised database of his many resources, plans and creations. The ones that she could decipher offered her plenty of knowledge that she wish she knew years ago, bombs built into android 18 and 17’s chests, the development diary spanning years on the creation of his ‘perfect bio-mechanical android’, and plenty of details about the android’s creation and Gero’s obsession with her childhood friend.

“You are take that tone with me, you old hag…” Pilaf grumbled under his breath, treating Bulma like a violent volcano just about ready to explode. “All I’m seeing is rubble” He could tell that she was especially cranky today, always shooting him that glare that burned holes in his clothes, snapping at him any time he asked why they were looking to scrounge up relics of times that no one wanted to remember. All she told them when they arrived with sixteen an hour earlier was that she was looking to take some of Gero’s ideas to improve.

In the highly educated opinion of the Earth’s rightful Emperor, Pilaf found this prospect suspicious at best. Leading him to madly gesturing for his two servants to come over to him while Bulma buried her head in her work. “Shu. Mai. Report!”

“Report?” Both minions offered only a confused blink at the request

The small goblin creature found himself slamming his foot down like a petulant child, waving his arms around dramatically. “I sent you to snoop around the compound hours ago!”

“Oh! Of course, Sire” Mai’s awkward laugh did not reassure the man.

“We just used my good old nose for a while, and searched the joint from top to bottom!” The dog thumped his fist against his chest, announcing his plan with pride.

“Specifically, the kitchen. And oh boy, you wouldn’t believe what we found, Sire!”

“Well, spit it out!”

“The kitchen… Was very well stocked” Pilaf felt a twitch coming along

“It even had ramen!” Mai exclaimed, a slight drop of drool pooling from the corners of her lips only to receive a flick to the nose from Pilaf.

“I give you a mission so important it could mean life or death for us, and all you did was check out the food supply?” The two had already dropped to their knees in apology, abusing their lungs to cry out their apologies before their emperor. “And… And… AND YOU DIDN’T GET ME ANY!?”

“We’re sorry, Sire!”

“So ashamed, sire!” Their heads hit the floor, pressing their foreheads against their master’s feet. “Please don’t chop us up into little bits to sate your brave and stunning hunger!”

“Did you at least do something evil?”

Shu brought his head back up, considering the question. “Well… They weren’t as well stocked when we left”

“You-“ Pilaf began, barely containing his anger, disappointment and growling stomach.

“WE WERE WEAK!” Cried Mai in response

“What else were we supposed to find anyway!?” Shu said between his repeated bowing (All while Bulma was too engrossed in her work to notice)

“Plans, suspisous cargo, a secret stash of dirty magazines. Something about that hag’s true intentions!” At the confused glances he received, Pilaf shook his head in dismay. This was why he was the all-knowing emperor they followed so dearly. “She’s looking up on Dr Gero’s old work? Keeping an ANDROID around her house? It’s so obvious. She’s planning to finish what Gero started/ She wants to take over the world with a n Android army!”

A gasp from Shu “Wow, really Sire!?”

Followed up by Mai “But the world’s YOURS to conquer, Emperor”

“I know!” Standing with his head held high, Pilaf drew his hand up to cup his chin, trying to look ‘intelligent’ and ‘thoughtful’. “It’s all clear to me now. First, she builds up an organisation of muscled freaks with power to rival Gods. But seeing this, Gero creates androids to take out the competition, so she manipulates that Son Gohan and indoctrinates her own son to take down the Androids as her little soldiers. And now that she’s taken complete control over the world’s resources and trust, with all military forces in shambles, she’s free to create weapons of mass destruction of her own. That poor kid, Trunks. Doesn’t even know he’s just being used”

“How diabolical, Sire!” Mai exclaimed, trying her hardest not to look over at Bulma. “I would have never figured that out. You’re so smart, Emperor!”
Pilaf takes her by the shoulder and turns her towards the corner of the room where 16 sat with his eyes scanning through a piece of paper. “And it all starts with him… The Ginger!” And only now did Pilaf notice that Shu had moved over to chat with 16 while Pilaf was pulling off his speech.

“Wow, this Eighter guy sure sounds nice!” Mai and Pilaf looked to see Shus tail wagging as he spoke.

For some reason, it felt extremely weird to witness 16 to raise his hand and innocently pet Shu. “You should meet him. He likes dogs, and his friend Snow loves dogs”

At this, Shu turned to Pilaf with stars in his eye, getting down on all fours to beg. “Really?! Sire, can we go to Jingle Village? Can we? Can we? PLEEEAAAAASE!”

“Jingle Village?” Came Bulma’s voice cut through their conversation with enough subtlety to send Pilaf jumping. “That’s near where Muscle Tower is, isn’t it? That was a Red Ribbon Army base. Would be good place to check…” She had turned away from her computer screen now, her chair twisted to face 16. “16, I know you want to read that letter as soon as possible, but I’d appreciate your help at the moment. Found something your unique attributes could help be more convenient”

The android looked up from his letter, nodding furiously. “Of course, Miss Bulma.” Before glancing back at the paper for a second. “Eighter has a stamp collection!? I believe I am extremely jealous. How lucky he and Snow are!”

Shu tapped 16 on the shoulder “Maybe you should get yourself a cool hobby to impress him with”

Mai, seemingly forgetting what Pilaf had just finished explaining to her, joined in with an eager smile. “Yeah! You should go collect fish, or take up Bird Watching. I hear knitting is addictive!”

“You really think I could do any of those? And Eighter would be impressed?” 16 pointed to himself, blinking as the only means he had of showing confusion.

“GUYS!” Bulma yelled over them all, her voice turning more serious. “I’ve been trying to put it nicely, but we have WORK to do” She didn’t mean to sound like she was yelling at 16, but she wanted to get this done as quick as possible. The quicker they finish, the quicker a mental load is lifted from her son’s back.

Pilaf jumped on the spot again, his survival instincts kicking into gear at the sight of the angered woman, rushing over to the other computer and typing away mindlessly. “Busy, busy. We’re very busy!” In his frantic typing, he accidentally managed to bring up a new tab, one of a blueprint with Bulma’s notes all over it. “What’s this?”

Bulma approached the computer, sighing at the screen “That’s just my attempt at trying to develop a way for 16 to be upgraded with the other Android’s parts”

“Pffft, sorry to burst your bubble; but this wouldn’t work” Pilaf instantly replied in a matter-of-fact tone.

“I know that, I’ve already tested i-… Wait, how would you know?” Bulma glared down at him suspiciously.

“I’ve uh… Dabbled with machinery, code and… All that. You know, for curiosity’s sake. Not for any evil intention or plans to take over the world. No sir!” He continues scanning through the blueprint and Bulma’s notes, shaking his head. “And I just notice that… Well...” He laid on the smug ‘Subtlety’ “This just isn’t possible. Those other two androids were made to be cybernetically enhanced humans. Their parts would mesh well with a fully artificial human, the technology for that hasn’t been invented on Earth”

“On… Earth?” Bulma froze in place, catching that look of sudden realisation in her eye. “Of course! How could I be so stupid?”

“You said it, not me!”

She took off back to her desk, kicking her chair over to the side as her fingers slid over the keyboard with a manic grace. “The technology isn’t on Earth. But what if we took it from an alien?”

Android 16 was just as confused as everyone else as they all let out one loud “Huh!?”

“Years ago a galactic tyrant called ‘Frieza’ landed on this planet, he was looking for revenge on a friend of mine, Goku. Long story short, Goku killed him and his men, as well as partly blowing up the ship he came in” She was barely understandable with the sheer speed of how she spoke, different images popping up on the screen in her mad search.

“I think I understand” 16 nodded, recalling Gero’s data on that faithful fight with Frieza, where the tyrant and his father were easily crushed under Son Goku’s power. “There’s a chance that some of that ship is still intact at this very moment. And possibly salvageable for our uses”

“And if we get that salvage, we could upgrade you, and then you could… Help Trunks” There was a renewed sense of vigor in Bulma’s limbs, a relief dancing on her fingers. All of which was quickly brought to a screeching halt as soon as she looked up at the screen again. “That isn’t a good indication…”

“What?” Pilaf couldn’t make sense of the screen

“To make things short: I have a scanner that can detect Frieza’s ship, even in its wrecked state. I simply booted up the scanner to find where the ship is, since I can’t remember every inch of the wasteland. But…” Bulma stopped

“Oh, I get it!” Said Pilaf

Before Mai pointed out “But if only this Frieza guy came to Earth…”

There was a moment of silence, a grave look of contemplation on Bulma’s part. “Then why is the scanner picking up three separate readings from across the world?”
***
A mountain. A proud man of dust and stone that has only grown stubborn in his years, reaching the highest peaks, and tickling the sky over a foundation of rock. All brought to ruin, collapsing in on itself in an explosion of debris at Android 15’s one crimson blast. He stood at the foot of the what used to be a mountain, rocks raining down around him without him paying the slightest of attention. His hand was held out in a lazy manner, the other hand in his pockets, clutching his addiction.
Through the thick fog of dust (Which did not phase the android in the slightest) he could see the large form of 14 having little trouble in rising to his feet, a blank expression prevailing as a few rocks pounded against his forehead. Not even a dent in the Android’s metal flesh after the energy attack.

“Good to know neither y’all got ya circuits rusted over the years” 13’s voice called with a coy edge. “Was worried I’d have to get ya tuned up after that Pan kid got ya wires twisted”

The man sat quite the way away from the two sparring machines, lounging in a lawn chair (Which neither wanted to ask where he found it) with the tournament poster obscuring his face. “That wannabe martial artist is gonna get squished” 15 curled his hand into a fist, throwing himself to the side as 14 rushed in to get a surprise punch off. Usually, motivating himself to do much ‘training’ was a hard thing for 15. He was already a powerful android, he didn’t need to hone his skills, that’s what his CPU chip was for.

But after coming into contact with that… Female, with her blood, every line of code in his mechanical mind screamed for a release of tension that had been building up for centuries. Everything screamed for action, to complete his purpose, to spill the blood of Son Goku. That itch was served through plastering his target’s face, the face of his new obsession over everything within punching distance. 14 had her eyes, Goku’s eyes, Pan’s eyes, Gero’s distain. 15 rushed around his enemy grabbing a hold of his long pony tail and pulling the large android into an air spin, sending the man slamming into the ground with enough impact to turn what remained of the mountain into a crater. Before the other android could react 15 was upon him, his feet hammering down upon 14’s chest and pinning 14 to the ground.

Pan would be struggling under his feet, completely humiliated and broken, bleeding from her open wounds. Gero in his mind would laugh, he would gloat, he would be calling up to the heavens hoping that Son Goku could see this. It would only need a few more steps for the killing blow. A kick to the throat to watch her drown in her own blood? Atomise the last of the Son Legacy with ki blasts? Or grab her by the throat and let Gero watch the life slowly drain from her eyes. Then we’ll take care of the runt that slaughtered your siblings… Gero’s voice echoed.

One move and it would be over. It would be over. But this wasn’t the target. This was an ally. “Can’t kill you. Guess I lost myself there, man” 15 hopped off of 14 with his hands returning to his pockets. “All this waiting is killing me…” He had wanted to pursue Pan as soon as they had realised her identity, crush her while her mother was still there to watch. But Android 13 held him back, ‘It aint time for that’ he’d said, recovering from his confusion and giving a predatory smile. Gero agreed, Gero wanted humiliation, a spectacle of a defeat that the world tournament would certainly provide.

Even forgetting Gero’s sick desires, what Android 13 said, goes. The alien creature that had modified the three androids seemed to have changed their programming, for one reason or another it was decided that 14 and 15 would be naturally subordinate to 13’s word. Though now that 15’s computer chip looked back on that factoid, 13 was certainly the oddest of their little trio. While there was always something off about his gung-ho attitude and easy acceptance as a mere tool, the final piece was in his reaction to finding the Granddaughter of Son Goku. Excitement.

Like 15, 14 felt that burning rage of Gero hounding for just a drop of revenge against the girl, the programming renewing it’s primary objective. Yet the southern android was unusually casual about the whole ordeal. As if he wasn’t doing this because it was what he was programmed to do, but because he wanted to. 15’s databanks recognised this sort of reaction being a symptom of duty, doing something out of obligation to loyalty. Thirteen was the one who was completely fine with his situation and had no queries with his metal flesh and role as a tool.

Yet, he was starting to seem the most human. Exchanging a look with 14, they both nodded towards each other, their programming registering this trait under ‘Dangerous’. Maybe this was why Thirteen was the first of them to be deemed a failure in the first place. “Oh, and if y’all could keep it down, that’d be nice. The phone line’s been getting juicy” The two looked towards their fellow Android, who dropped the poster down onto his lap, allowing them to finally see his face. Revealing to them the gleam of the blue scouter held against the android’s ear, his grin stretching to inhuman lengths as multiple loud voices conversed from the scouter’s frequency. Three of them were recognisable as those aliens they met in Tunson.

The most alarming voice was the one that the Androids could immediately recognise as having the similar vocal patterns to that of Frieza and King Cold. “As you can see, I had some… Pleasant company on the journey. She called herself a ‘Kai’, a term I have not heard before”

“Ya know, Poppa Gero never raised me to be a gossip” 13 chuckled, the scouter set so that those on the other end of the line could not hear his voice. “But I do believe that I’ve got just the juiciest little details for our bosses”[/spoiler]
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Wed Jul 19, 2017 10:23 pm

The Pilaf Gang here were an absolute treat. I do hope however that they're helping to move the plot along rather than create some funny gags. Also, I do have to point out, but this is the most spelling errors I've seen in a chapter of yours. You really do need to slow down, and proof read it.

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Wed Jul 19, 2017 11:41 pm

Gog wrote:The Pilaf Gang here were an absolute treat. I do hope however that they're helping to move the plot along rather than create some funny gags.
They did just advance the plot here, Pilaf is the one that reminds Bulma she could look for Frieza's ship, leading to all of them discovering the three signatures. Though the three will have much more direct influence on the plot later when it comes to 16 and the androids since they are pretty tech savvy when Bulma isn't there.
Also, I do have to point out, but this is the most spelling errors I've seen in a chapter of yours. You really do need to slow down, and proof read it.
The crucial thing I forget to do... Thanks for pointing that out, I'll edit the chapter later to correct those mistakes.

What did you think about the Android trio's part of the chapter? Too pretentious?
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Wed Jul 19, 2017 11:51 pm

Kanassa wrote: What did you think about the Android trio's part of the chapter? Too pretentious?
It wasn't pretentious at all. In fact I wished you used Dr. Gero more in it. I liked that 15 was beating up the other androids, so consumed by his blood lust. Of course the fact that they just wiped out a mountain is something that should be addressed...

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Wed Jul 19, 2017 11:58 pm

Gog wrote:
Kanassa wrote: What did you think about the Android trio's part of the chapter? Too pretentious?
It wasn't pretentious at all. In fact I wished you used Dr. Gero more in it. I liked that 15 was beating up the other androids, so consumed by his blood lust. Of course the fact that they just wiped out a mountain is something that should be addressed...
Noted. Gero will communicate with them more directly the next time we see them (13's spying on Cooler, he's gotta tell someone about it). Strane, I thought you'd dislike the part where 15 and 14 are noting 13 as odd.

Yeah, they're not really focused on keeping a low profile anymore.. Good for Trunks and Pan that they were done with their training sessions before the tournament, or they'd be a bit bothered that someone fucked up their mountain.
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Sat Jul 22, 2017 8:28 am

Chapter 21: Time Crisis!

[spoiler]Chorona had never encountered home sickness before, never had the chance to, never had the time away to miss the Time Nest. Even in her youngest memories after her ‘birth’ she remembered sitting under the same blank void behind the filter of the Time Nest’s protective barrier. Back then the beautiful surface of this realm entranced her, the water was clear crystal that never moved nor had the capacity to be disturbed. Such a perfect surface preserved in the peak of it’s prime.
But then again, back then she didn’t have the attention span to notice that the beauty was on in the surface. Back then she had things to distract her, duties to tend to. Back then it had been more than just her master, her and Tokitoki. Back then…. She hadn’t had the chance to go outside. Looking into those clear waters now, she could only push into the surface and watch the flaws ignore her. She could only think back to how much she wished this was the sludge water of the swamp, infected with dirt, mold and green.

“It had that strange feeling, like it was alive. I could feel the almost solid lumps in the water slosh around in my hand. It was so gross! But, wonderful” She looked to her side, sighing as her single audience member blinked in confusion. “Have you even been listening to anything I’ve been saying?”

In response, Tokitoki pushed his beak forward, pecking the ground to her side; a hungry look in it’s eyes. “Don’t you even start with that, you’ve already been fed!” The owl unleashed his wings, flapping wildly. “Just listen, my mid-life crisis is more important than your gluttony!” With a shake of his head and an involuntary hoot, Tokitoki returned to being an almost statue-esc pile of golden feathers. “I’ve never felt homesick, I don’t know what it feels like, but I think I am feeling the exact opposite... Out there, there’s this wind thing that pulls my hair out of place and makes my clothes move. It’s so weird. Sitting here, all I can think about is how much I miss the outside… Is… Is that wrong?

“Should I be happy to be back in here where everything is artificial? Where the only view is of an empty void where all time flows? Where my best friend is a bird who I pretend has a voice? No offense” She felt her hands balling into fists, slamming them into the plain grass, with no dust coming out as a result. “I should be excited that the next eternity I’m going to be sitting in that tower, watching every other person getting damp, coughing out smoke, smelling flowers, hanging out with people. People”

For a moment, she felt her mind linger on a memory of Cooler making an insulting quip at her expense, his lips and eyes aligning with his condescending tone. It felt funny, when it probably should have felt rude and offensive. “I should be ecstatic that one day I’m going to be alone here, waiting for the next apple to drop from the tree so I have someone else to leave with this amazing fate when I’m gone… Because I’ll be a Supreme Kai, a super, special important one because I don’t have a choice in my future. That’s amazing. I’m honoured. I’m sure if my mother wasn’t literally a tree, she’d be so proud” She stood up and forced a smile onto her face, Tokitoki jumping up to perch himself on her shoulder. Her foot kicked at the water before she turned away, pushing on towards the tower in the centre of the Time Nest. She needed something to distract her, she didn’t want time to think anymore.

She did not miss the outside. She did not miss the mud. She did not miss the wind. She did not miss the trees. She did not miss Cooler. She did not miss her only day of freedom. She was happy. Because if she wasn’t, she would be spitting in the face of the man who raised her from birth. And he’d been spit upon enough.
Within the Time Vault she could see that he was already hard at work, his tall form slowly circling the large bubble that contained the strange crystal that caused the rift. In one hand he held an open book, and the other was outstretched, an open palm facing the bubble and reciting different spells at the crystal to see how it reacted. “Any news, Master?” She didn’t knock, she didn’t wait, she just wanted to start the conversation quickly.

“While the origins of this strange crystal are only theories at the moment, I find it safe to say that this is heavily connected to disturbances to the timelines. And that this is certainly not the only one of its kind” He spoke softly, many questions and no definitive answers on his mind. Chorona hoped he didn’t see the small look of joy she couldn’t hold in at that ending fact. If there’s more of them, would that mean more scouting missions? Which instantly made her feel guilty and want to slap herself for such terrible thoughts. Crystals bad.

“That’s terrible news. As long as those crystals are there, time’s getting distorted, right?” She brought up the negative and fought focus solely on that this was a bad thing.

Her master sighed “I’m afraid so. To put it simply, these crystals are like a symptom of disease, their distortions caused by the changes prior made to history by other time travellers” He let his hand drop to his side, closing the book with a sharp frown. “But if it is caused by the previous changes to history… Then our situation is grim, indeed”

“What do you mea-“

“Chorona, we have monitored every single time traveller and the events they have changed to this date. And yet only NOW are these crystals appearing. Why only now? Why not when the first Time Traveller from Universe 12 set off to manipulate events so that he may usurp the then current God of Destruction?” Chorona took a thinking stance and raked her brain for answers. What is different between then and now? Multiple changes. But what implications could there be that could frighten my maste- Then it dawned on her. That couldn’t be good. “Maybe time is only reacting now because it is getting tired of mortals tearing it in two. Maybe, it is only at this point that it is starting to grow unstable with the timelines and rifts created”

The room had nothing else but them to create sound, and yet Chorona felt like it had suddenly grown silent. “So, if we gather all these crystals, everything gets better; right!?”

It did not make her feel better when his expression only became grimmer. “It is possible. But I have nothing definitive here. We could already be too late. This event is unprecedented, so there’s no prior experience to get more concrete answers from. We can only… Hope that our best works”

Chorona took a moment to sigh, bringing her hands up to wipe across her forehead. “Well, at least we kind of have a solution. But how can we collect these things? I was only lucky that it stopped screwing with the environment when I captured it. I thought it might have been related to the Yardratians me and Cooler defeated in the rift…”

“That is the odd thing about these crystals. They don’t just distort the landscape around them, it seems that however they are created they are formed out of fractures in history. They are a literal error in existence itself, a tear in time, which must be why they are able to open rifts into other parts of history of which it copies into its own closed off area outside of time” He moved past her, gesturing to the scroll that still pulsated with purple aura. “If someone utilised these right, they could possibly use it to open their own rifts in time, copy history, and use the energy bursting within to add to their own power. In this instance, it powered up those yardratians. Maybe if given enough time, the crystal itself could maybe adapt an image of people and grow it’s own twisted sentience”

“And in the wrong hands, that could be disastrous…”

“Which makes me wonder. The person who caused the last change before these appeared… Was their aim to create these? Or was this simply an unintentional consequence?” The Supreme Kai of Time couldn’t shake the feeling that there was more to this, that there was an angel he had yet to cover. Most of what he was suggesting here was a theory at best, with little defining evidence, and yet still his thoughts lingered.

“You’re the Supreme Kai of Time, if anyone should know about these things, it would be you. And since you don’t, no random mortal should know, should they?”
“That’s exactly what has me afraid, Chorona”
***
In the shadow of the void the crystals glowed the brightest, hovering over a calm sea, a blank slate. They like diamonds of pure blue, images of cataclysms dancing in the corner of their reflections, a mirror held up against the stream of history. Everything below them could be mistaken for one great expanse of a hollow realm. No aspect of life was invited into the cold atmosphere, for an endless out of order row of similar diamonds spiralled outwards towards a glimmering horizon they’d never reach.

But the realm did move, it did change, it did have it’s patterns. The colours of it’s unreachable boundaries shifted every so often, from a dark mixture of blue and purple, towards a bright and foreboding filter of gold and crimson. Both colour schemes had a way of disorientating people, traversing any length of the realm would feel pointless as you’d only get so far before your stomach starts to twist and your eyes start to wonder if you had even moved from your last spot. Sometimes, the crystals would shift in colour to reflect the mood of the realm, to reflect history’s mind scape. From a soft blue to a warm and welcoming red that threatened to suck you in, linger too long and it would absorb you into its folds like quicksand. The world that existed outside of the boundaries of time was like a living breathing beast, it had it’s needs and it had it’s instincts. But not even the base level of free intelligence. It only had one concept, survival.

And from the depths of the abyss the sole inhabitant of the realm rose, his form barely visible from the sheer speed in which he leaped from crystal to crystal, like electricity phasing through power lines over stepping stones. There were no directions, the demon has learned that in this realm there was no centre. Forwards is backwards, west is east and over is into. It was a disorientating struggle to keep a sense navigation, but a few years in this hell made the mental trickery poultry compared to the rest of the experience.

Feeling the immense power of his pursuer closing in, the demon reached up to grab the end of the crystal above him, kicking off his feet and rotating with the crystal. Just as his legs flipped over and his feet collided with the top of the crystal, he felt his foe streak past him, and as he regained his balance perched upon the tip of the crystal he witnessed his foe swerved to face him.

His body demanded rest, this fight had been a struggling endurance test for hours, but he couldn’t rest, no now. The pain dug into his skin, with one glance he could see crystal freezing over his wounds and pouring into his bones. The strange atmosphere here sometimes offered a harrowing period where time would freeze over any participant that wasn’t strong enough to push through. If you stayed still, you were dead. If you were too weak, you were dead. If you couldn’t summon the ki to keep your body protected, you were dead.

He had to move, he had to attack.

Thankfully, looking into the sneering eyes of Beerus the destroyer was all the demon needed to motivate his body to power through. A few of the crystal shifted to a subdued orange in reflection of the fury pumping through his min at the thought of that painful memory, the crystal digging into his skin shattering as he powered up, leaping off and charging at the manifestation of the destroyer god. By bodily urges alone, his fists came forward like charging bulls, horns beating against Beerus’s body, brutal and unrelenting. The God could do nothing against the unrelenting barrage.

Beerus fell upwards, his perspective shifting into a spiral dive through the maze of blue and orange. The demon closed in from behind, ki blasts flashing for a moment before leaping from his hand and raining down on the God like a hail of energy. But by this point, Beerus regained his senses and swung upwards, which was to the side, dancing through the blasts in a graceful spin. All before he landed on a platform, blue crystal formed from time freezing a connection between multiple crystals; like a suspended platform.

The demon landed in front of the source of his pain, the trigger of his greatest failure. The crystal twisted around them to form spikes and pitfalls for their
battleground, a group of a smaller crystals falling from above (Or below?) and stabbing into the ground around them. They shifted, their reflection forming familiar scenes. It made it hard for the demon to keep his gazed locked on his enemy. Rushifa had lost count of how many times he had fell at this situation’s feet, nor how much time had passed since he was first imprisoned. His once refined light grey skin had become as white as snow, the complexion of marble with flesh as tough as katchin. The once amber softness of his eyes had succumbed to his savage urges over the years, reduced to blood red slits. If there was any consolation, it was the remarkable endurance of his black and gold gi as well as the power radiating from his towering form.

The power formed from every second of hell. Every second of the crystal freezing over him, freezing under his flesh, making it feel like insects had wormed their way into his body before deciding to scratch, rip and naw at the inner wall of his skin for a way out. This power forged through the death of his humanity, the power that would help him take down the Gods…

Around him, yet again he was faced with the crystals of his misfortune, like mirrors reflecting his regrets. Constantly taunting him by surrounding him with his failures. IN one, he could see the glimmering images of the memorial graveyard to his loyal followers, on another he witnessed his younger self cradling an older demon in his arms in the middle of a battlefield. He took off quickly, pushing out his ki to peel away any more chunks frozen over his body, passing by the reflection of Prince Dabura holding him by his throat. He couldn’t afford to be that weak again. He couldn’t lose here.

Beerus slammed his foot into the ground, smashing through a piece of the platform and using the momentum and power of the kick to send the broken pieces upwards, where he casually pushed his leg into a whirl of multiple kicks; sending each broken piece of crystal shooting towards Rushifa like jagged spikes. This time, Rushifa didn’t listen to that sense of panic, throwing himself forward into a hand stand; pushing off his hand with as much force as he could muster. This sent him sailing over the spikes and allowed his foot to slam into the back of Beerus’s head, the so-called God now stumbling forward.

His eyes narrowed, a hint of enjoyment flickering on his tongue like a drug. It was an addiction he desperately wanted to ignore. He did this because he had to, not because he enjoyed it. Either way, it was time for the killing blow.

Beerus swung around and attempted a quick punch, but he never had a chance as Rushifa ducked under the punch and slamming a blue ki blast into Beerus’s shoulder, completely shattering his arm into chunks of crystal. While the cat was distracted with his lost limb, Rushifa rolled past his opponent, turning to face Beerus’s back and with no hesitation he sent his foot full force into the back of Beerus’s leg.

Rushfia didn’t want to admit it, he didn’t want to accept the need, but he wanted to hear that sickening crack of a broken bone or a gasp of shock and pain from Beerus. He wanted the satisfaction of hearing the bastard realise that he’d been beaten. But no, there was no screams, no cracks, no bones, no sense of emotion. Just the shattering of the crystal creature. Because it wasn’t real, it was simply a pale imitation of the real thing.

As Beerus’s body collapsed to the ground, Rushifa made sure to finish him off quickly and stamp the cat’s head into a million pieces. Hoping to finish it before that side of him asked for a chance of prolonging the end. He almost made the mistake of talking to the crystal again, of treating it like the real thing, but he wouldn’t give it the satisfaction. He was shaken, but this place hadn’t broken him yet.

“Soon… Please, Yarimasu, I need to escape” Their mental connection was weak, most of the time neither was strong enough to maintain it, but those moments of talking to an actual person were complete bliss. “I fear what this hell will turn me into” To his surprise, the atmosphere died down, the freezing hours no longer a problem for now.

But before he could get comfortable one last crystal fell before him, almost rivalling him in height, a glimmer caught in his eyes. Before him, the reflection twisted and moulded itself in a way he had not seen before. The colours shifted back and forth at an ever-increasing speed, not soft, subtle or ordered, just chaotic. Almost explosive. By the end of it all he wasn’t faced with a reminder of his past, nor a scene from someone else’s history, but one sole image.

A boy. No… He narrowed his eyes. A Saiyan. That Saiyan. The ball-cut, oddly coloured hair. The left-over jacket of his mother. The sword. Oh yes, Rushifa recognised this one. He had never met the boy, but he had watched in the shadows, peaking from behind the curtains. “Trunks…”

Why was he being shown this?

The question tugged and pulled at his skin, to the point he could swear he wasn’t alone in the realm, as if somebody was standing right next to him; laughing. That had to be just his mind again. But the more Rushifa looked at the boy’s face, bearing the trade mark smirk of his prideful father, the more Rushifa felt something stir from within him. But he didn’t know what. Anger? Annoyance? Pain? Fear? Whatever it was, it was roaring, crying out for action, yelling at the void. It made his body shake, it made his nerves flair.

With thinking Rushifa’s growled at the image and in a split second his fist smashed into the boy’s face, reducing the crystal to a pile of shattered pieces on the floor. And it left Rushifa shaking, like he was suddenly over taken by an adrenaline rush he couldn’t control. Why… Wha- What came over me?

His gaze was compelled back towards the ground, where the shattered remains of the crystal lay in a heap. He looked to see if the image was still imprinted on the shattered pieces, but… All he could see was his shattered reflection staring straight back up at him. “Maybe my mind is trying to tell me something… Something buried under the paranoia…” He couldn’t break his gaze, his mind trying to piece together a justification. “Yes, Trunks. You kill be my first kill”[/spoiler]
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Tue Jul 25, 2017 6:48 pm

Reading through this chapter I do have to ask, but it’s best not to refer to Beerus as ‘the cat’, but something else, maybe ‘the Destroyer’? I know it doesn’t seem like much but it really helps to keep you in the mood. Anyway, for Rushifa what would he end up as if he stayed in there for too long? It doesn’t seem like something you’re going to answer in story. I did like the fight scene near the end, it was deliciously bizarre and hard to follow.

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Wed Jul 26, 2017 2:34 am

Gog wrote:Reading through this chapter I do have to ask, but it’s best not to refer to Beerus as ‘the cat’, but something else, maybe ‘the Destroyer’? I know it doesn’t seem like much but it really helps to keep you in the mood. Anyway, for Rushifa what would he end up as if he stayed in there for too long? It doesn’t seem like something you’re going to answer in story. I did like the fight scene near the end, it was deliciously bizarre and hard to follow.
Yeah, I don't know why I typed 'the cat'...

I kind of will answer it in the story, but now that I think about it the consequences are more vaguely implied than answered. At this point in the story, he'd become a couscous statue, imprisoned in his own mind with no sense of control. Kind of like a coma patient in a way, where the only things he'd be able to witness is his failures due to the crystal reflecting his history. At a later point in the story, the consequence kind of changes, but more details on that is a pretty big spoiler about a certain character.

Did you feel like you got a good introduction to Rushifa's character in that scene?

And what do you think of Chorona's scene? Did the emotion get through? Was the exposition there too heavy handed? Clunky? Unnatural?
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Thu Jul 27, 2017 6:56 pm

Kanassa wrote: Yeah, I don't know why I typed 'the cat'...
We all have our days. :P
Did you feel like you got a good introduction to Rushifa's character in that scene?
Yes, and no. I got a pretty good idea of who he was, and a vague idea of what he went through as a person. But, character wise? Not very much, besides he's determined, and tactful. Which makes sense in the scenario which he is in, he's in a prison slowly going into a coma fighting against a crystal Beerus. (Of course it has been a few days since I've read the chapter itself, so I might have forgotten beyond the vague details) Also to ask will you explain later how he and Yarimasu managed to meet?
And what do you think of Chorona's scene? Did the emotion get through? Was the exposition there too heavy handed? Clunky? Unnatural?
I liked it. You managed to show off her longing to go back, and the sheer loneliness of The Time Chamber. Nah, you managed to explain it in detail, and make it feel natural. :)

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Fri Aug 04, 2017 9:30 pm

Chapter 22:Old habits die hard - The tournament begins!

[spoiler]“Hello and welcome to the grand re-opening of the OFFICAL 24th World Martial Arts Tournament. It is an absolutely stunning day to celebrate this momentous occasion. And believe me, nobody is more excited for this huge turnout than me!” Throughout the tournament grounds of Paypaya Island, newly installed speakers repeated the Tournament Announcer’s words, his voice sounding just as pumped with energy and excitement as Pan had heard on the video recordings of past tournaments. But she couldn’t blame him, she was just as excited, so much so that Grandma ChiChi had to push her down to stop her from shaking with anticipation. “All seeking to participate in the main event, please note that registration is now open and will close in two hours! To the rest of you, please enjoy this magnificent event for all it’s worth with the various attractions built round the island”

Speaking of her Grandmother, Pan tore her eyes away from all the potential fighters she could point out in the crowd, looking up at the old woman. Chichi was practically giddy. It was a strange sight, but not an unwelcome one. After the deaths of so many family members left the woman widowed and alone, Pan was shocked to even see the woman here. Pan loved her grandmother, that was always a fact (She baked some damn good cookies!), she loved seeing Chichi happy. But it was an almost disturbing contrast to the rather depressed woman hiding behind a chipper mask Pan had heard all those stories of Goku from.

“He’s not wrong. We’re getting some really good weather today!” Chichi had been taken aback since they had gotten off the plane (Pan had complained that they could have just flown, but according to her grandmother, that wouldn’t have been traditional), overwhelmed by a wave of nostalgia. “You’d never be able to tell that this place had been abandoned for 25 years. Everything looks so smooth and fres- Oh, and can you just smell the fresh paint! It’s just like how I remembered it”

Pan had to hold in her laughter at just how enchanted Chichi’s voice had become walking down memory road “There’s no way you remember it all down to the smell, Granny” As they moved forward they were faced with an overwhelming number of merchant carts littering the open field area of the tournament grounds, which Pan considered a literal sea of opportunity for her stomach.

One stall in particular caught Chichi’s eye, bringing the two to a stop as she pointed towards an ice cream cart. “They even bought back ‘Phils’, and the banner’s still misspelt” She started giggling, though before long her laughter faded into a longing stare. “I remember Goku dropping his cone on my head by accident”
“Oh yeah. The Tournament was where Grandpa first proposed to you, right?” Pan hadn’t really put that much thought into Chichi’s recollection of that fateful match, mostly because she was a little girl excited about the green alien giant named after instruments when she was listening to that story.

“I remember it like it was yesterday. The cheering audience, the delightful announcer, oh…” Chichi threw her head into her palms, cheeks reddening as she bashfully reminisced. “The bruises from our fight hadn’t even faded, and yet he was already telling me about his heart. SO ROMANTIC!”

Pan had her arms back behind her head casually, leading Chichi over to the ice cream vendor. She was hungry, and her mother was currently busy with an offer of ‘Free Alcohol Samples’ on the other side of the tournament. “It must have been weird fighting your boyfriend”

“Not at all, Pan! All couples have to fight sometimes, it’s practically flirting” Pan had a feeling that something was off about that statement. But Chichi was the one who married and had a son, so she probably knew better.

“Really? All the dates I’ve had always ended because I wanted to fight…” Her face tightened into a sceptical look, with Chichi merely shook her head at with a ‘knowing’ shake of her head.

“That just means that they are not the ones for you. If your significant other can’t handle you physically, how can they handle you as a person?” Oof, there’s that ‘don’t take notes’ feeling again. Maybe ice cream would help this feeling fade.

“Words to live by, Grandma” In a matter of seconds, the two had arrived at the ice cream vendor, greeted by a friendly pink haired woman. In Pan’s opinion, you can always trust a person with a sweet hair colour to make great ice cream. “OOooo, Grandma; let’s get a quadruple sundae cone!” Pan’s finger was extended, her mouth agape with a gasp as she enthusiastically prodded the large image of the ice cream on the options board. White, Pink, blue and green? She didn’t know anything about flavours, but those colours looked tasty!

“Funny, that was Goku’s favourite…”

“Approved by my great grandpa? That makes me want it more! Please, Grandma! Please!” Watching what was supposed to be a grown and mature adult, begging, and moaning like a child for an ice cream cone… Well, that was a wave of nostalgia that threatened to knock Chichi off balance. Only giving the woman a chance to shake her head and think I can never say no in these situations. I never learn.

Minutes later Pan was already licking away at her new treat, her tongue lapping up the peak of ‘ecstasy’. Chichi shook her head. “You’re getting it all over your face! Did Videl not teach you any manners?”

Pan shrugged, the tip of the highest cream peak poking at her nose. “I’m a fighter in need of energy, Grandma. I’m like a starving man getting the first drop of water he’s had in weeks”

“That’s not ho-“

“Oh, look! A bunny! IT’S SO FLUFFY!” With a restrained sigh, Chichi turned to the next attraction that had caught Pan’s gleeful attention. The attention span of a gold fish, I swear… It was a, anthropomorphic bunny, some sort of animatronic Chichi guessed. It’s bright pink fur stood out in the mix of orange, yellow and green the rest of the grounds had going on. Pan, on the other hand, didn’t seem to notice anything off about a human sized rabbit who could speak fluent English, hopping over to the bunny to shake it’s hand. “My name is Pan, what’s yours?”

“Hi, my name is Bobo. You are my best friend!”

The bunny’s stiff hands closed around Pan’s open palm, prompting her to vigorously shake his hand. “Oh, I’m sorry. I already have a best friend, and I don’t think you can have two besties. That’s like a rule or something. And I don’t want to cheat on anyb- OH GOD!” In an unsurprising display of short sightedness, Pan’s careless handshake was forceful enough to rip off the Bunny’s hand, leaving her to jump back in shock and horror. “I’M SO SORRY!” Before completely turning to the opposite direction, grabbing Chichi’s hand and bolting away from the ‘scene of the crime’. “If anyone asks, he was a secret spy android bunny!”

“Pan-“ Before she could register the person calling her name, Pan found herself coming to a sudden stop as she crashed against a wall of flesh and muscle. Her head whined in pain at the impact, it felt like she was running face first into a brick wall. “What… What did you just say?” Looking up she was greeted by Trunk’s concerned gaze. It might have just been the dizziness of slamming into the man, but it looked like he was sweating profusely. Like he was agitated, or scared.

“Oh, Trunks; didn’t see you there… Uh… Sorry” She felt his hand clasp around her shoulders, steadying her.

“Pan. What were you saying before you ran into me?”

He suddenly grew suspicious. Why did he sound so… Worried? “Huh? I was just talking about the bunny I disme- I mean, about that bunny animatronic that some VANDLE mercilessly dismembered. I’ll tell ya, the World Tournament is a sick place sometimes. Why?”

And just like that he fell calm, quickly pulling away from Pan and letting out a brief sigh of relief. “OH… I just… I thought you mentioned andr-… I thought you said something else” Instant change in demeanour. Now, Pan wasn’t an expert on social interaction (In fact, you could say that Trunks and 16 being her only real friends speaks volumes about her social skills), but something was clearly putting Trunks on edge.

Maybe she should offer him ice cream, that solves everything.

“Trunks?” She reached for his hand, recalling that this was what most people thought of as a gesture of comfort. “You okay? You seem a be in ‘Just-had-a-nightmare’ mode”

He swayed for a moment, looking a bit distant, like he hadn’t heard her at first. But soon his eyes flicked over to her, his body lazily swaying like a drunk man. “I’m fine, Pan. Just a little tired, that’s all. Mom kept me up all night with her latest experiment… UH, speaking of that, she won’t be coming to watch you in the tournament. She’s got very important plans underway”

The corners of her lips fell into a rigid frown. It was clear that Trunks wasn’t telling the whole truth, which also meant he was partly lying to her. Does that mean he doesn’t trust me? No, no, no… It’s just that it’s something he doesn’t want to say in front of other people, right? I’ll bite his ear off about it later. No sense is prying right now. And a grunt alerted Pan to the other person present, poking her head around Trunks’s tall frame she spotted her mother close by, stumbling a bit. “And speaking of mothers, you’ve found mine”

He glanced back, recollection reaching his face as he nodded. “I caught her threatening someone at their stall”

Videl tried to cross her arms and glare, a task made harder with the constant fight for balance as her legs wobbled. “The sign said, ‘Free Samples’, not ONE free sample! That clerk was trying to rip me off” She didn’t seem completely drunk, her speech being fine at least.

“Are you kidding me?” Chichi’s scolding voice made pan jump, she had forgotten the woman was there. “I can’t believe you. Your sweet little daughter is preparing for her big day today, and you’re drinking?!”

“The registration period doesn’t end for another two hours, I need something to entertain myself with” There was a fire already brewing between the two as their eyes locked onto one another in a scornful glare. “What I don’t need is some Old Lady lecturing me. I can handle my alcohol!”

“What did you just call me!?” Nostrils flaring, veins bulging, Chichi stomped over to the unphased Videl, making sure to get right up in the woman’s face. “I’ll have you know that most people don’t see age. Especially for one as YOUNG looking as me”

“When did over 100 become the new young?”

“I can see where Pan gets her attitude from!” Chichi snarled, the two woman practaclly forehead-to-forehead, like two bulls locking horns.

“Don’t bring me into this” Pan and Trunks distanced themselves from the two angry woman, Pan was just happy to have her ice cream.

“When Mom said Chichi and Videl didn’t get along, I thought she was joking…” Trunks scratched his head at the scene, worried that he might have to step in before they get past name calling and rip each other’s heads off.

“Ah, I’m sure they like each other enough. This is just…” She pursed her lips as she spotted Chichi pulling up her sleeve to wind up a punch, making Pan laugh nervously. “Uh… How they show affection?” By now, Videl had grabbed a hold of Chichi’s arm, attempting to throw the woman oer her shoulder. “They’ll be fine!”

“If you-“ Trunks paused for Chichi to result to biting. “-say so.” His hands returned to his pockets, bringing Pan’s attention to the large weapons hanging from his back. She couldn’t remember when he got the sword, but she only now realised he was rarely seen without the weapon slung around his shoulders.

“Why’d you bring a sword to a tournament about hand-to-hand combat?” She pointed towards the hilt poking out from behind his neck, where she could see old green
leather wrapped around the handle.

“My sword?” He blinked at her in confusion, his hand darting upwards to grab the hilt, his eyes widening as soon as his fingers brushed up against it. Had he not even realised he still had it? “I guess I’ve had it so long that it’s a part of me…” His fingers wrap around the leather, forming a tight grip on the weapon. It made him smile.
“In some ways, it gives me comfort, confidence. Like I always have someone watching my back. An old friend”

Pan seemed less accepting of this answer, her eyebrows raising as she spoke “You’re putting a lot of stock into an oversized tooth-pick that breaks every other week” She inched forward on one foot, pushing herself up on her toes to jab her finger into Trunks’s cheek. “Especially when you have me RIGHT here”

“You?”

“Confidence and Comfort? I was born in all that!”

For a moment his gaze went down, his jaw slacked a bit and a drowsy cloud hung over his head. His eye went back to Pan, a serious stare as a memory played through his mind. “I’m sorry, Pan, but… No. You’re not”

“What’s that supposed to me-“ Before the words could leave her mouth a loud barrage of yells (“Hey, stop him!”) seemed to drown out her voice, directing Trunks’s gaze away from her. She tried to voice her question yet again, but it seemed the rushing of footsteps closing in on her and boyish laughing stopped Trunks from hearing her. And by the third attempt Pan had forgotten about what she was trying to say as a body slammed into her smaller frame. The obviously taller boy reacted like he hit a steel fence rather than a smaller girl, the momentum of his run sending him tumbling over her and onto the floor, muttering to himself about Pan ‘watching where she was going’. Being the stronger than life warrior she was, the boy’s collision barely made her flinch. However, the surprise of it all did cause her hand to instinctively open; letting her ice cream cone fall to the ground.

“You… You…” She felt so small suddenly, just her staring down at the gruesome remains of one delicious treat. The grief of it all forcing her to her knees, letting her get a closer look at the sullied corpse. “You murdered my cone! THAT WAS MY ICE CREAM!”

“What’s the big deal, you bonehead!?” The murderer sneered.

“Pan?” Trunks took a step back, his tone worried as he saw Pan shaking. “Are you okay?” Saiyans were very protective of their food. Before he immediately slammed his mouth shut as Pan’s head snapped up to let the boy get a good look at the near psychotic glare she was sending his way.

“Are you blind AND stupid?”

A raging fire burning in her eyes as she got to her feet. Slowly at first, her face switching from anger to teetering on tears and back to anger with ease. “Put up your dukes!”

“Put up my wh-“

“I said PUT UP YOUR DUKES BECAUSE I’M GOING TO RIP YOUR DUKES OFF AND BEAT YOU WITH THEM!” She screamed at the top of her lungs, causing many members of the crowd who were watching the scene unfold, jump away in frights. “You ice cream murdering ninny!” She felt chunks of the ground pulled into the air as her aura swirled around her. At this point the boy was backing away, slowly realising that there might have been something a tad wrong with this woman. He had no chance to get away as he witnessed Pan immediately charging towards him without hesitation. And just before her fist came into contact with his face, he shut his eyes tightly and hoped it would end quickly. He just stole some watches; did he really deserve this?

But the punch never came. No pain, no bleeding, nothing but the screams of the girl “Trunks! Let go of me! I have to avenge my cone!”

Slowly, the thief opened his eyes, peeking through the space between his arms that he threw up as some make shift shield. As implied, Trunks was holding Pan back by the scuff of her shirt, pinching the bridge of his nose and sighing. “I’ll buy you a new cone! You can’t just assault somebody for accidentally bumping into you”

At the mention of a replacement cone, the girl’s blinding rage immediately drained away, making way for a bright smile and a hopeful “Really!?” And as the thief made his way away from his brush with physical torment, he decided that maybe this was the world’s way of telling him that he needed to stop shoplifting.

Trunks had to take a moment to cringe, groaning at his predicament. “Yes, yes, just stop trying to attack people. Save it for the tournament!” With a small moment to make sure she had calmed down, Trunks let go of her shirt. “You can’t go five minutes without stirring something up”

And she just gave him that classic Son grin. “That’s why we’re best buds, Trunksie”

“Trunksie?” He cringed.

“Yup” Her grin then morphed into one that Trunks was tempted to call shit-eating and condescending.

“Please tell me that isn’t your nick name for me” He hoped his mother never heard of this, she’d never let it go.

“Well, I’ve been thinking. That’s just one in a list. There’s also Trunky, T-man, Mr. T, Big T, Tr-“

“No. Never again. Please, for the sake of my dignity”

“But-“

“Drop it, or I’m not giving you your present” That got her attention, her eyes lighting up at the prospect of a gift.

“Gimme! Gimme!” Reverting back to her child-like mannerisms, she began to jump up and down on the spot. Is it food? It has to be food. Bulma’s food is the best! Her anticipation rose as Trunks dug into his pockets, pulling out a capsule. OOoooo, it has to be something big. Trunks wouldn’t use a capsule if he could just carry it by hand, right? Her eyes practically bulged out of their sockets upon Trunks hitting the release button and chucking the capsule up in the air… And then her eyes proceeded to only shrink in size as she witnessed a rather flexible and small parcel wrapped up with string fall out of the ensuing smoke and into Trunks’s hands.
“Trunks… I love you and all, but… Nobody wants socks in a gift”

“It’s not socks!”

“Then what is it?”

“Open it!” He insisted, to which Pan only rolled her eyes, her fingers lazily digging into the shoddy packaging. Even without using her super strength the material broke apart like mash potato. But she came to a halt upon catch a sneak peak of an orange glow.

“No way…” She felt something rise up in her throat, a need to squeal? A need to laugh? A need to look back to her childhood?

“I assumed you didn’t have any official fighting gear of your own…” She completely pulled apart the packaging to reveal a bright orange gi unfolding in her arms, clearly heavily copying the appearance of her father’s od gi. “So, I went to Master Roshi and asked him to help me create a gi similar to the ones all Turtle Hermit students wear. You know, like Goku. Though the emblem on the chest area is empty since you don’t really have an official school you’re learning from”

“Trunks…” She pulled out the gi to let it dangle in it’s full glory. Below it she could see Trunks even went through the trouble of making the blue undershirt for her. Jus the sight of the gi sent her emotions into overdrive, after so long she could hear her father’s voice by her side once more, proudly encouraging her after five-year-old Pan proclaimed she’d be a strong fighter too (After breaking the coffee table). Her fingers gripped the fabric, tears welling up in her eyes. She could hear him laugh. She could feel his hand on her shoulder.

Without a second thought Pan threw herself at Trunks in a wild tackle/embrace, wrapping her arms around his waist and burying her face in his chest, almost knocking the man over. Muffled sobs of ‘Thank you!’ could be heard as her hands searched for new ways to painfully hug the man. “I’m hoping that means you like it. I thought maybe the familiar gi would make sure you feel confident when you get on the tournament stage”

“I don’t know what to say besides- Thank you!”

“You’ve been training all this time to be a fighter, a damn good one at that. You deserve to at least look the part, don’t you?” Trunks tried to softly push the girl off of him. Don’t get him wrong, Pan was quite the hugger, but she was starting to stain his shirt…

“I guess” She leaned back with a smile, sniffling. “I’ll go put it on right wa- Wait a minute...” She stopped, staring at Trunks sceptically. “How did you know my measurements?”

Before Trunks could respond the speakers started up again. “This is a reminder to all who wish to participate in the tournament: Sign Ups for the tournament will be closing in an hour, so you better get over here quickly!”[/spoiler]
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Mon Aug 07, 2017 7:12 pm

ChiChi had to be my unexpected favourite of this chapter. The scene that focused on her was both funny, and incredibly sincere. But, the worst part of this chapter must be Pan, unfortunately. She was just so exaggerated in her characterization for the whole entire chapter. Like the gag where she nearly assaulted a thief for bumping into her and spilling her ice-cream. I just can’t see Pan from any other chapter doing that. She was just so grating for the entire chapter. Also, Bobo, I didn’t like him but odds are he’s Dr. Sludge in disguise. :D

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Mon Aug 07, 2017 8:49 pm

Gog wrote:ChiChi had to be my unexpected favourite of this chapter. The scene that focused on her was both funny, and incredibly sincere.
I was aiming more for bitter sweet since it's basically a chapte rof her going "This would be happy IF MY HUSBAND AND SON WEREN'T DEAD!"
But, the worst part of this chapter must be Pan, unfortunately. She was just so exaggerated in her characterization for the whole entire chapter. Like the gag where she nearly assaulted a thief for bumping into her and spilling her ice-cream. I just can’t see Pan from any other chapter doing that. She was just so grating for the entire chapter.
Well, the thief thing and Bobo was supposed be homages to the similar scenes Pan had with Goku at the World Tournament in the show (I could never get Pan telling the boy "Put up your dukes!" out of my head when I watched that episode). Though i can see why it would e considered out of character for this Pan. I notice how this is really the first time I've shown Pan interacting with people outside of those she is close with that have done something that has aggravated her. I should have probably shown much more, since before hand I've just had various characters mention how little Pan got on with other people (Specifically, you might remember the multiple times Videl mentions Pan accidentally breaking property and hurting others for minor things). So, this must be pretty out of nowhere for just a gag.
Also, Bobo, I didn’t like him but odds are he’s Dr. Sludge in disguise. :D
Well, Ddoctor Sludge DOES have a rabbit costume.... Hasn't used it in a while though :D

What did you think of the whole "Trunks giving Pan a replica of Gohan/Goku's Gi" exchange?
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Mon Aug 07, 2017 9:21 pm

Kanassa wrote: Well, the thief thing and Bobo was supposed be homages to the similar scenes Pan had with Goku at the World Tournament in the show (I could never get Pan telling the boy "Put up your dukes!" out of my head when I watched that episode). Though i can see why it would e considered out of character for this Pan. I notice how this is really the first time I've shown Pan interacting with people outside of those she is close with that have done something that has aggravated her. I should have probably shown much more, since before hand I've just had various characters mention how little Pan got on with other people (Specifically, you might remember the multiple times Videl mentions Pan accidentally breaking property and hurting others for minor things). So, this must be pretty out of nowhere for just a gag.
It's not even that, throughout the whole entire chapter she just felt so... exaggerated compared to how she acts in other chapters. She consistently and constantly kept on switching between being incredibly happy and incredibly childish.
Well, Ddoctor Sludge DOES have a rabbit costume.... Hasn't used it in a while though :D
That could explain why it's so stiff. :think:
What did you think of the whole "Trunks giving Pan a replica of Gohan/Goku's Gi" exchange?
I'm going to be honest it was pretty cliched, I did like the fact that she doesn't have a symbol on her gi however, and I liked the reasoning for it. Also, Pan does have a point how did Trunks get her measurements?

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Mon Aug 07, 2017 9:24 pm

Gog wrote:I'm going to be honest it was pretty cliched, I did like the fact that she doesn't have a symbol on her gi however, and I liked the reasoning for it. Also, Pan does have a point how did Trunks get her measurements?
He asked Videl.
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Tue Aug 15, 2017 9:18 pm

Chapter 23: The Face Stealer

[spoiler]It was a strange experience for Pan, looking down at the bundle of cloth in her hands. It felt nostalgic, despite her never wearing the gi before, like a long-lost friend you never knew you had until they came back. Maybe a memory triggered that was too lost in her mind for her to pinpoint. “Urg, look at me. Getting all soft over some cloth” She muttered to herself, finally dropping the bundle back onto the bench, pulling apart the string binding it and spreading out the various pieces.
She was alone in the tournament changing rooms, every other competitor arriving already suited up in their costumes or gi.

To be honest, it embarrassed her a bit, being the unnecessary odd one out. Reminded her of being the one person to forget to make a card for her mother’s birthday party. The lighting didn’t make it any better, it might have just been her mind but the sole source of light seemed to form a spotlight directed over her, leaving her on the sole island in a sea of shadows. This is why she still kept her night light. “When did I admit to myself that such small things bothered me?”

First, her hand reached for the baggy orange bottoms, the cloth only seeming to shimmer in the light. It was warm to touch, soft fabric that curled around her fingers, and as she slipped her feet into the leg, that warmth blossomed into confidence. As if someone was whispering encouragement in her ear. The light shifted, a groan of metal like nails on a chalk board. Pan stopped, casting her gaze back around the room. Still empty. The wind must have pushed something.

Returning to her gi, Pan took a moment for a deep breath, pulling up the blue undershirt next. As the shirt came over her head, her ears wiggled at the distinct creak of the door. Her body snapped to face the door, her feet pushing her back towards the bench. All at once that encouraging voice turned into a cynical giggle, all at once something bubbled in the pit of her stomach, something that made her feel sick. Something was wrong.

Her eyes found sanctity in the gleam of the floor tiles. There was comfort in the clear surface, distraction in the small cracks. “It’s just nerves. Keep your eyes on the floor, put everything else on and leave. You’ll be fine” Pan couldn’t tell if she thought that or said it out loud, but her mind was too rushed to care. Sweaty palms rushed to put on the rest of the outfit, once again finding comfort in the glow of the gi. For a moment that nostalgia washed over her again, wrapping around her in a warm embrace as she pulled the top over her head. The fear had lapsed, her hands took it slow grabbing the belt, but her gaze remained locked to the ground.

Where she could clearly see her shadow, quite the few inches away from the edge of the light circle, she only just began to notice the gradual formation of another shadow. One that was just a bit taller than her, but with much more wild hair. And as she tightened the belt in a knot, she found comfort in the shadow, a familiar comfort. The encouragement continued.

Papa?

And in a blink of an eye the shadow had changed, the shape flipping itself around completely, as if a person was standing opp- “Greetings!” And all Pan could do was scream as her body slammed into the bench, smashing it into a million pieces. “Has my sudden appearance startled you, little one?” As far as Pan could understand, the voice was both feminine and not at the same time.

“I ju- What?” Pan could barely speak in between breaths, her behind groaning at her sudden collapse to the floor. Despite the glare of the light that was now shining directly down on her eye, Pan could make out the form of a woman now standing in front of her, an inhumanly wide smile straining her flesh.

“Then again, I suppose that with as long a life as I, everyone’s age would be considered barely out of the womb in comparison” She let out high pitched laugh that immediately grated on Pan’s ears, as if she had made some sort of clever joke. “You do have the ability to speak. Do you not?”

Everything about this woman felt off at best and unnerving at worst. The complexion of her skin looked similar to a mime’s, powdered to an unnatural pale tone, looking less like flesh and more like plastic, threatening to blend in with her unmoving eyes. “I can speak fine, I was just… Surprised” It looked as if the girl was moving to hep Pan to her feet, but that just made Pan jump up faster, something inside her telling her she did not want the woman touching her. When did I get so nervous?

“Oh, my best and worst apologies, Miss Pan. I was merely admiring the scene before me. You were alone, and the lighting so perfect, in the moment I saw small time to create a dreaded atmosphere!” In that moment, the voice slipped, a much more man-ish one hanging on the edge of the woman’s sentence as she clapped her hands together. “Did it prove too effective?”

“I’m fine!” Pan reaffirmed, quickly thinking to change the topic “Are you fine? I mean, with your skin being so pale and all”

“Pale?” The woman blinked in utter confusion before casting her gaze down to her hand where she could indeed see that her skin tone wasn’t as dark as she thought. Does she not know what she looks like? “Oh, skin disease. Who knew? But certainly adds to the shock value. Nihehehehehe” And of course she had a strange sounding laugh to boot.

“You didn’t HAVE to scare me”

“I have a weak spot for dramatics, dearie. When I see such little time for perfection… Well, I don’t like to waste time. Unlike so many others” Who talks like that? Pan let the thought keep her nerves at bay, stepping away as the woman tried to come closer, violet pigtails bouncing from side-to-side. “But then, what would you know about that? You have such energy, such…” Her silver eyes looked at Pan in an almost hungry manner. “…Youth. Why, you have such little past to hold you down at the moment. I’m jealous. Such freedom from the chains of time”

Now that the woman was getting uncomfortably close, forcing Pan to blindly back away at a pace that would break through the wall, Pan started to realise why the woman felt so off. She didn’t look human, she looked like a human-sized doll. A lifeless puppet with a bunch of accessories and motionless facial features. “Uh, well, it’s been nice talking to you-“

“Kasonna, dear”

“Kassy, can I call you Kassy? I’m sure you have a lot of cool time poetry stuff to talk about, but I’m sure the preliminaries are gonna start soon. Maybe I’ll see you in the ring!” Pan managed to turn herself towards the door, trying to sound as casual as she could. If there was something off with this woman, she didn’t want to set her off. And if there wasn’t, she didn’t really want to be mean to the woman just because for some reason she was suddenly nervous. A lot is going on today, that’s all. I’m just overwhelmed by the Tournament. I’ll forget about all these nerves and stuff when I hit the ring and get my head clear.

“Oh yes, a fight the ring is a very personal matter. One can learn much about a person through the way they fight” From where Pan walked, Kassona’s voice came off more like an echo, slowly fading away with the howl of the open window’s draft. “And I’m sure we’ll have plenty of time to get to know each other, Son Pan”
With an awkward smile and a wave, Son Pan disappeared from view and politely closed the door behind her, leaving the woman to let out a sigh of relief. “Oh my, that was utterly unbearable. I thought I was going to faint from stage fright! How did I do?” She dug her fingers into her unusually deep pockets, pulling out a variety of finger puppets placed delicately on her left set of fingers.

“You were brilliant! Best performance I’ve seen in years!” The pinky finger dressed in pink cloth and makeup was always Kasonna’s favourite. “It almost made me weep… But then I realised I don’t have eyes to cry with”

“Oh, Pinky. You are just a delight. You could learn something from her, Indy” Her eyes flickered to her index finger, the most offensive one of the bunch, who simply had his cap pulled down, ignoring them all. How rude! “Do you think she bought into my little act?”

This time, the thumb butted in, his little straw whiskers flaring. Kasonna switching to a younger voice. “You sure scared the crap out of her, Mr!”

“Yeah, you were a total creep” Agreed the twin fingers, glistening with purple nail varnish

With a purse of his lips, the face of the woman dissolved in an explosion of dust, making way for Kasonna’s long and narrow nose and jester-like features. “I thought I was rather mysterious and alluring”

“You need subtly for that!” The thumb called out, though Kasonna could forgive the boy for his outburst, he was the new kid after all. “And you were like my mommy when she listens to that jazz crap”

Full crimson lips turned, his head shaking “That is inappropriate language for someone of such low age! In fact, I don’t think an eight-year-old would even know such words”

“Pfft, you don’t care about character accuracy. You didn’t even bother to fix my face after you stole it. I don’t have whiskers!” The fat thumb wiggled to make it’s exclamation.

“Silly boy, there is no theft in taking something from those who are simply too… Kind to give or deny consent” Kasonna leaned down to press his nose against the thumb, bending it backwards until her hear a bone groan. “You are starting to develop quite the attitude problem, little one. Do you want me to bring your mother in on this? I’ve cut off my fingers for less”

“What are you gonna do, use her to clean the wax from your ears?”

“That would be ridiculous” The man pulled back, shaking his head to loud tutting before raising his foot. “She’s the big toe, how am I going to pull her all the way up to my ear? She wouldn’t even fit”

The top of his boot began to move, his hand coming over his mouth to muffle his voice. “Is someone calling me fat up there?”

“Nothing of the sort!” He chortled in his ear grating way, moving across the room in a peculiar manner; sweeping his legs, pivoting on his feet, waving his arms. His walk was like that of a dance, putting on a show for an invisible crowd. All the way to the mirror, where he took a good look at himself. Only one thought coming to mind Yes, I’m devilishly handsome.

But he had to remind himself that he did have a goal here, and sadly that required hiding his face of pure beauty stuck in its finest moment. With a click of his fingers the face grinning back at him in the mirror began to shift, his puffy flesh swelled up into mini balloons on his cheek, latching onto his bones, moulding his face like clay. Until eventually his flamboyant features had been stripped away, his mask returning. His breasts were back, bring his attention to the pitiful outfit. “Tut, tut, tut. Green gi with violet hair? What were you thinking?” He spoke down to his foot, where his big toe decided to simply ignore his criticism.

“This face, it doesn’t suit me. But… I guess I’ll just have to bear with the sight of lesser beauty. Time is always on my side, of course” A sigh, just one of the many burdens he had to bear in this new existence. But looking into the mirror, a wondrous thought made the Face Stealer’s lip widen. “Though I wonder, Son Pan. How fitting would your face be?”
***
“And you have checked the Preliminary match ups?” Gero’s voice came through the midst of many crackles, in the background 13 could hear the repetitive cry of machinery as Dr Sludge drilled into a metal surface. “Any variables that should… Worry us?”

The southern trucker sat up against the wall with one eye open, slouching, bored, lazy. Because that’s all he was supposed to be for now, just some innocent country bumpkin waiting for the tournament to start, lightly juggling an apple. “We spent a good time watching the participants, 14 compared notes. There’s some veterans coming back, none that would raise any alarms for guys like 14 and 15. Bacterian, Giren, Morgan, none that measure up to our level” It had been decided between the three of them that Androids 14 and 15 would compete in the tournament while 13 simply sat back as a spectator, giving Gero a better overview of any of the battles that would occur. The dynamic duo were off somewhere, but 13 sat in the corner of the ‘Preliminaries Grounds’ (No one bothered to check if he had registered) enjoying the view. “Its like- Whoa there”

The Gero A.I took a little interest in the man that suddenly came into 13’s view. Yes, the fighter was of great familiarity, but Gero wouldn’t quite consider his that important. “I wouldn’t expect him to return to a tournament. I thought he went into employ as a body guard of sorts” The man stood out amongst the crowd, being the only man in the room wearing bright pink, as well as the unsubtle “Kill you” written on his chest.

“Surprised the geezer wasn’t banned from the tournament after his last stunt” 13 found himself chuckling, pushing himself to his feet and moving through the crowd, near the man. “They must really be desperate for something exciting if they’re welcoming back a man who tried to kill his opponent” He came to a stop, keeping his gaze straight ahead with a smirk as Mercenary Tao, prized assassin once under the Red Ribbon Army’s employ, pushed straight by him. He was scowling at something. “Though, this temple seems to attract lotta weird folks. I swear I saw a squawking chicken taking up a fight. Compared to that, an assassin would at least stir something up. Hell, maybe they’re considering death matches”

“A fine example of how far the human race has fallen, but at least this means we should have no problem getting to face down against Gok-… The Son Brat in the tournament” If an A.I could feel emotion, Gero knew his wires would be bursting with anticipation, For a moment the images of Goku’s corpse flashed within 13’s eye, Gero’s hatred making the man’s inside’s itch. “Normally, I would simply have you all surround the girl and crush her head between your palms like you did the Kai, no matter what audience you have. But I cannot truly exact my revenge until I take what is dear to these germs of a species; Pride. I want- No, no, there is no want… I need to watch the humiliation flood her eyes while her blood is spilled across the sta-“

13 politely coughed, trying to remain casual in full view of the crowd. “Sir, could you calm down a little; you’re making me over heat here” Thankfully, he felt the heat die down as Gero got a hold of himself.

“You’re right, Tucker. It seems that even my restraints as an A.I cannot stop my anger from taking control” The voice hesitated, 13 could hear Sludge yell obscenities after accidentally slamming some tool into his fingers. “I wonder, if the girl is here, perhaps she brought her teacher along with her. He would stay to support her endeavours, would he not?”

“What are you saying, sir?”

“Trunks still must pay for his transgressions against my legacy, for his disposal of Cell. For taking my-… For whatever he has done with MY android. And this one doesn’t have any special conditions for his death, unlike the brat” Gero never did well talking about Android 16, and 13 never knew why, though something in his circuitry said that he should.

“You want me to go out and look for him?”

“The Preliminaries will be last a long time. While the other Units watch these brainless baboons beat each other to near death, you can take care of the boy” 13 continued on his way, heading towards the entrance where he had no problem sneaking out through the crowd. “And just imagine how the girl will feel when even her own master is so embarrassed of her that he doesn’t turn up”

As the morning sun trickled into view, 13 decided to question Gero’s plan for once. “Are you sure about all this? I know you want the girl dead an’ all, and I don’t really mind popping a few spines; but… What about our ‘Friends’ putting this whole thing together?”

“What do they have to do with this? They helped bring my plans to life and continue to support my legacy” Gero was well aware that this all went far beyond his vendetta against those that had wronged him, to a discovery that would make Gero one of the greatest minds to ever grace the universe (Or Multiverse as the Arcosian had informed him). He would have never guessed it would be connected to this Majin Buu creature.

“You know that other Saiyan’s been staking her claim on either of the half-breeds. Ain’t you worried that killing either is gonna make her one angry bull?” The day hit him like a cooked oven mit, is insides heating up again, he was lucky he wore his hat today.

13 assumed that the noise Gero made was a sigh, but he couldn’t quite be sure. “It is understandable that you would come to such a conclusion, Unit 13, as your interactions have been limited to that woman” The A.I displayed disgust. “I shall simplify this for you. She is a part of an obsolete race of savages who even in their ‘Super Saiyan’ form were surpassed by my creations. But me? Suffice to say, I am too valuable an asset. If she takes issue with me taking my rightful vengeance, she’ll just have to swallow that fragile pride of hers and deal with it”

“Whatever you say, Sir” The crowd was now sparse on the Tournament Grounds, most people already heading in to wait on their good seats within the stadium section of the temple. With a clear view of the area, Gero could see that this left little to no witnesses if 13 wished to try anything. Though there seemed to be no sign of Trunks.

“That cowardly, uh… WOMAN!” But it wasn’t long before they spotted the form of Chichi trying out one of those ‘Hit the button with a hammer’ attractions, though the owner of the stall seemed absent. “Leaving a poor old lady on her own with physical labour. Oh, I knew she was trouble when she seduced my poor Gohan”

“The Wife” Was all Gero referred to her as

“Looks like she’s needs help” 13 stalked towards the woman at a slow pace, a grin growing as he noted the woman was certainly feeling the flaws of old age catch up to her. No witnesses for the moment. It would only take two seconds. He came to a stop behind her, towering over her like a towering monster, looking down with empty eyes and a twisted grin. “Do you need any help, mam?”

She turned around with a curious frown, the hammer spinning around with her turn and almost skimming 13’s nose. He didn’t flinch. “Oh, I’m sorry. Did you want a turn on this game?”

“Nothing of the sort, Miss” His eye grew small and kind, an arm slung round to rub the back of his neck. Just an innocent country bumpkin. “I was just looking for a friend of mine. I think you might know him”

She bought that southern charm hook, line and sinker. “Oh, really? If there’s anything I can help you with, I’ll be sure to do my best. Who are you looking for?”

“It’s a friend of mine, Trunks. Trunks Briefs?” The hammer came around again as Chichi swayed, her arm moving upwards when she recognised the name. This tie, 13 moved back and acted as if he was about to trip and fall. Awkward, clumsy, add in some light hearted laughter.

“Sorry about that! Sometimes my arms just have a mind of their own, I guess” She reached forward to keep him balanced. “And yes, I do know Trunks. Such a sweet boy. He’s very close to my Grandaughter. They’re both adorable together” Yet again she had to take a moment to sigh, memories of Gohan returning. He would be so happy with how they turned out. “I’m afraid you just missed him. He was called away for something important, though he didn’t say where. I think its serious. As soon as he got the call he almost looked scared” She clapped her hands together, trying to put on her best smile “But don’t worry, I’m sure he’ll be fine. Maybe if you wait around he’ll be back”

“I’ll be sure to do that. Thanks for the help” 13 tipped his hat to her as an expression of gratitude, where as she simply bowed. Gero quickly noted that chasing Trunks down wouldn’t be productive now, he could be anywhere. Tracking him would could distract them from the tournament for too long. It wasn’t worth it. “I’m Tucker. Don’t think I got the pleasure of your name, Miss”

“Chichi, Son Chichi” She bowed again, before turning back to the game, her smile quickly being replaced by a frown accompanied by a growl. “I’ve been at this game for ages! You see, I came up with the idea of getting Pan a stuffed animal. You know, for some encouragement and a friend to hug; yes, I know she’s not a little girl anymore, but everyone deserves a stuffed bed friend”

13 let out a pleasant whistle “Such a caring grandmother. Lucky kid, lucky kid.” Chichi didn’t stop to notice that she never mentioned that Pan was her Granddaughter, but simply continued.

“So, me and that FLOOZIE, Videl, came over here to try and win a stuffed animal. And guess what? That harlot goes and ditches me, says she’ll ‘save me a seat’ and leaves me here to get the present”

“Leave a lovely old woman like you here to swing a lotta weights around? The nerve of some people” He shook his head, tutting. “And yer still here? Damn”

“I know. I never liked that girl, I swear. I mean, I kept quiet and kept out of Gohan’s way, because he’s my son and it’s his choice. But, urg… That woman is trouble”

“I’m sure she’s just jealous”

Chichi lightly punched his shoulder, giggling to herself. “Oh, you’re just saying that”

“Honest, I swear” 13 could practically feel Gero’s non-existent eyes rolling. “How about I take a crack at this game, save ya the trouble?”

“You would do that?” A nod and a smile “Oh, you are such a sweet heart. Thank you” Only one minute later the game had been broken, the hammer in two and a large stuffed bunny sat on Chichi’s head, both her and Android 13 chuckling. “Thank you again, not just for the game, but for keeping this old woman company. Strange, I never thought talking with strangers could be so pleasant. I haven’t spoken with many people outside of my family in a long time…” She again smiled, but it was that held a sad weight to it. “I hope you find Trunks” And with that, she was gone, ready to shove that bunny in Videl’s face.

“You could have killed her” Gero commented

“There’s no point” 13 shrugged, closing his eyes again “Unless you want me to kill her?”

“No. While she may have wedded Son Goku, her pain means nothing while he is dead. She does not have his blood” 13 started to move back towards the Preliminaries Grounds, there was no point in being out here anymore, but…

“Oh, Metal Man!” The call made the android come to a sudden halt, his expression switching to a wide eyed. Had someone so easily figured out that he was an android? How!?

Swerving his head to look to the left he was instantly met with a tall woman, a young face that was almost sickly pale. “You must be mistaken-“ It wasn’t so much the threat of some random person finding out that he was an android, it was more Gero’s anger that someone could possibly so easily figure it out when the point of the Androids was that they would be able to blend in.

“Your face. It’s so concerned. Such a perfect expression, I’d love to capture it in the moment” She sauntered over to the android, running a finger up the man’s exposed chest, poking the fake flesh with wonderment at how real it felt. “Odd, I honestly thought this form would get a much more welcoming reaction”

“Ah.” Gero calmed down, his creation had not been found out, it was simply an ally they had already met. Kasonna’s lips formed a pout as she/he looked up at 13.

“The Face Stealer” He spoke through 13 so that she could hear him.

“Oooo, is that what you’re calling me now? I’ve already told the fingers about this; it’s not stealing. Nihehehehehe” She let out her horrid laugh be slinking away, circling the android.

“What do you want?” 13 couldn’t speak right now, so Gero took full control of the situation, bluntly getting to the point.

“We’re friends, are we not?” In her hand she held an apple, as she pulled it up to her lips and took a bite, 13 realised she had stolen his. “Is there a problem with me noticing your festivities and wanting to join in on the fun? I have plenty of time, yet I can see no problem. Unless, of course, you’re planning something unfortunate” Her eyelids were half closed, almost as if she was drifting off to sleep, but still she giggled with an almost unmoving mouth. Like a strange puppet.

“It’s never that simple, Face Stealer” Gero willed 13 to close his arms, glaring at the fake girl.

“You don’t have act so rude towards me, young man” She took another bite out of the apple, taking her time to chew it as she mulled over her next line. “But if you’re going to be so grumpy, I wouldn’t want to waste your time. I just want to give you some advice”

“Advice?”

“We’re all capable of incredible things, especially with the right drive. Saiyans were mostly brutes, but their ambition accomplished much in the short time in the spotlight they had. For others, like that Cell creature or those lovely teenagers you kidnapped for your experiments, their ambition lead them to the people who would end them. Let it be a lesson” She tossed the apple back to Thirteen and headed away from him.
”Be careful not to choke on your own ambition, Doctor. Because Saiyans don’t take too kindly to theirs being threatened”
[/spoiler]
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Gog
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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Wed Aug 16, 2017 3:26 am

So, it seems that this chapter has unveiled the true main character of the Fan Fiction! Kasonna! He also has a strikingly similar name to another writer… :P Anyway, strikingly enough he definitely had to be my favourite character in this chapter. His interactions with his fingers, and toes were priceless, it’s also funny how much personality toes, and fingers can have. He’s a delight to read. But, strangely enough I feel like I’m slightly disappointed in him. All things considered I originally viewed him to be the horror antagonist of the story, the one who would stay in the shadows, pounce from the darkness, leave us guessing. The one who would be played straight with no jokes to him. Instead we have another wacky, and imaginative character who blends in with your wacky, and imaginative cast of characters. At this point in time for your fanfiction you must play a character completely straight in order for them to stand out from the crowd. Also, this may have turned out negative, but I sincerely did enjoy Kasonna.

Also, this chapter helps to flesh out 13’s character. Him disobeying Gero, and not killing ChiChi really did endear me to his character. And I’m practically counting down the seconds until the father son reunion.

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Kanassa » Wed Aug 16, 2017 5:58 am

So, it seems that this chapter has unveiled the true main character of the Fan Fiction! Kasonna! He also has a strikingly similar name to another writer… :P
And he's like, a half-saiyan, half-namekian, half-god hybrid; and he's super edgy, and and he's super awesome AND HE'S TOTALLY BETTER THAN THAT DICK WHO BULLIED ME AT SCHOOL; FUCK YOU STEVE!
Gog wrote:Anyway, strikingly enough he definitely had to be my favourite character in this chapter. His interactions with his fingers, and toes were priceless, it’s also funny how much personality toes, and fingers can have. He’s a delight to read. But, strangely enough I feel like I’m slightly disappointed in him. All things considered I originally viewed him to be the horror antagonist of the story, the one who would stay in the shadows, pounce from the darkness, leave us guessing. The one who would be played straight with no jokes to him.
Uh, in his introduction, Kasonna was introduced as as an old perv rubbing his nipples hungrily on a roof, waxing poetically about time. Only at the end of that chapter did you realise what he was doing. Yeah, he does have his horror elements (He's the Face Stealer, and later he is gonna start doing some more fucked up stuff towards the main cast), but this chapter shows the same horror as he did in the other chapter; contrast. He has a front of a flamboyant jester, luring his prey closer, before unveiling his true face. That's why his name is a pun on masquerade. Like his introduction chapter, he starts off simply affirming that he's weird in interaction with Pan and showing what seemingly happens to his victims (As well as outright stating he cuts off his own limbs), before going on the end the chapter by threatening Gero and telling how small he and 13 are in the grand scheme of things.

Yeah, he's not killing a little kid this chapter, but I really can't see how this is any different to the characterisation of him from his introduction.
When Super apparently shoves Goku down our throats:

Kanassa wrote:
FoolsGil wrote:I hope Mark is dead. But chances are the dragonballs will bring his stupid ass back. :D
- FoolsGil, Out of Context, 2017

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Re: Fanfiction: Dragon Ball - Another Road

Post by Gog » Wed Aug 16, 2017 6:27 pm

Kanassa wrote: Uh, in his introduction, Kasonna was introduced as as an old perv rubbing his nipples hungrily on a roof, waxing poetically about time. Only at the end of that chapter did you realise what he was doing. Yeah, he does have his horror elements (He's the Face Stealer, and later he is gonna start doing some more fucked up stuff towards the main cast), but this chapter shows the same horror as he did in the other chapter; contrast. He has a front of a flamboyant jester, luring his prey closer, before unveiling his true face. That's why his name is a pun on masquerade. Like his introduction chapter, he starts off simply affirming that he's weird in interaction with Pan and showing what seemingly happens to his victims (As well as outright stating he cuts off his own limbs), before going on the end the chapter by threatening Gero and telling how small he and 13 are in the grand scheme of things.

Yeah, he's not killing a little kid this chapter, but I really can't see how this is any different to the characterisation of him from his introduction.
Then I'd say that you may have done his introduction incorrectly, unfortunately. Kasonna came more off as creepy, threatening, mysterious nothing like he was in this chapter. Which was why I was so surprised that he was acting like he was in the first chapter as well; It was a complete 180 for the direction I previously believed you were going with him in the first place. And the humorous elements you were aiming for in that chapter may have been swamped in that part. Or hell who knows maybe I completely missed all of that, and it flew over my head. Wouldn't be the first time; Which just as adequately explains my shock at how he acted.

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