How can i meet a woman who likes anime / cosplay / Dragon Ball?

[goku the krump dancer]

How do y'all think people met prior to the explosion of chat rooms, social media and dating apps?

From my experience - college, workplaces, friend groups etc. How do you think people met before dating apps?

How do y'all think people met prior to the explosion of chat rooms, social media and dating apps?

Arranged marriages, high school romances, stuff like that I assume.

So this is for you and Nagyzold, putting arranged marriages aside since those usually only happen within tight knit cultures and religious groups all those other situations require you to talk to someone you don't know. If you have crush on girl you don't have class with how do you expect to get to know her? You muster the courage to introduce yourself and start a conversation and you know what? she could reject you and say "Oh I don't come to school to get hit on", funny thing about that rejection line is that you could substitute "School" for any other place or platform ( Malls, Grocery Stores, Nightclubs, college cafeteria's, Tinder, Bumble, Instagram, a friend's barbeque, Comic Con etc) and it'll still apply. So Knowing that, how can you dictate what's an appropriate place or what isn't? You can't, because its all person dependent which is why you just have to wing it and take a chance if she says no cool, if she says yes great now you have date for Saturday night but again its not about LOOKING FOR DATES IN A PARTICULAR SPACE its about MEETING PEOPLE BY HAPPENSTANCE. I don't know why you guys are getting that part confused.

I think what everyone needs to succeed in dating can be summed up with one word - confidence. That confidence can be built in any number of ways. As someone that used to go to the club frequently I can say that while I didn't meet potential dates or my now wife there they did help me become more confident when meeting people out and about, including people I found attractive, and that's what I would recommend anyone to go to them for. Also, if you go clubbing go with the intention of enjoying yourself, everything else will fall into place when you've built up courage.

The more confidence you have the less you worry about someone having similar interests because you are content with who you are and what you have to offer in a relationship. I'm not saying anyone should stop caring about a potential partner liking Dragon Ball, but it's important to accept it may or may not happen, and if it doesn't that's ok.

Plenty of couples have different interests but it still works for them. I would say great relationships should ideally have a healthy balance of shared and unique interests, because its good for two people to have been exposed to different things so they can learn from one another, as having all the same interests can be detrimental too (albeit not in all cases) by preventing both partners from becoming more open minded.

Yes This, I agree %100.

How do y'all think people met prior to the explosion of chat rooms, social media and dating apps?

bars and clubs? Again, no one is saying that you cant talk to people its just that if your main concern is to date, then there are better avenues to do so than following women in grocery stores.

If you talk to any regular person in real life they'll tell you that bars and nightclubs are the worst places to look for a potential significant other because most people who frequent those places are there for a good time not a long time.

gonna need a citation on that.

I cant tell if you're being sarcastic or not but do you just not talk to people outside of game chats and message boards? I could've swore this was basic information. Kid Boo already confirmed it but if you need further evidence just go talk your freakin Neighbor, its not that hard I promise.

On another note I'm almost curious as to how some of you function day to day with all this fear jammed into your heads, YBM you almost speak as if every non-LGBTQ guy out there has some innate urge to hurt you, or people like you in particular and that just plain crazy.

Both Trans Men and Trans Woman have been victims of rape and murder because they are trans. I can see why Julie does feel worried about meeting up with CIS Straight Men. Brandon Teena is one of the most well known people that has been killed for being a trans male and has their story adapted into Boys Don't Cry (I recommend it BTW).

As much as I hate to run the victim Olympics and compare Boogeymen because everyone has their own struggles, trans people aren't the only ones who get victimized. I live here in Philadelphia and just last year alone in 2021 there were over 500 murders within the city with some 70-80% being black men, So I have a far larger chance of getting a bullet in my chest than any Transperson does of getting raped or murdered yet I dont walk around outside thinking everyone is out to get me, that's no way to live a healthy life. Even with the Chappelle fiasco from a few months back its not like straight men across the country hopped in there jeeps and burned down there local Gayborhoods, there was some social media uproar and that was it. Plenty of LGBTQ folk walk around here with their heads held high.

Confidence is key...but it's not about walking in a room with your chest puffed out. People like that tend to be those with very low confidence and feel like they need to over compensate for that.


Basically its understanding that shit's not that serious. Maybe it'll lead to something, maybe it won't. But it doesn't matter. It's more about making social connections and just talking to someone. You also need situational awareness: knowing when and where is a good time to do something. That's why I don't recommend walking around grocery stores or malls trying to get a date. You might be thinking what you're doing is innocent and naive, but I guarantee that most people think you're being kinda creepy.

I mean we have so many different resources available that there's really no reason for any one to be doing stuff like that.

I highlighted the last part because everything you said before that is literally everything I've been saying this ENTIRE TIME so I wonder if you've been misconstruing what I've said thus far on purpose or what but that last part is a projection if I've ever seen one, how can you just assume that women at large believe that being approached in public is creepy? How can say that but say its not that serious at the same time? If its not that serious then you cant say people come off creepy by doing cold approach. If YOU aren't comfortable doing it, cool but that doesn't speak for everyone else, there're plenty of women who dont use dating apps or social media for dating and actually prefer a guy to approach in person, wanna know why homeboy? Because DUN DUN DUUUUUN people can creeps online as well, Shocker I know, you can can literally come off like a creep anywhere online or offline again for the billionth time its ALL IN YOUR APPROACH.

I never said anything about puffing your chest out, walking around holding your nuts or feeling entitled to anyone's benefit of the doubt so I'm not sure where that came from, regardless its called TAKING A CHANCE, regardless of where you approach someone online or offline some will assume the worst and others wont like I said before its all person dependent. If someone has a panic attack because I said "hey, how's it going" then thats on them not me. We all have horror stories about some rando coming to talk to us, no one is special in that regard.

Lastly, I know you thought you were being cool but dont call me "Home Boy", I dont know you, you don't know me, we barely converse on here, we're forum mates at best and thats it. You're not entitled to my benefit of the doubt so I can assume in your smugness you really wanted to call me a nigga but opted not to so you settled for the PC Homeboy, but I wont go there, just dont call me that again.

I honestly don't know if I can make myself more clear than I already have so if you disagree and think approaching a person in public is creepy or whatever fine, but that's your personal preference and doesn't speak for everyone else.

[CashmanX]

Both Trans Men and Trans Woman have been victims of rape and murder because they are trans. I can see why Julie does feel worried about meeting up with CIS Straight Men. Brandon Teena is one of the most well known people that has been killed for being a trans male and has their story adapted into Boys Don't Cry (I recommend it BTW).

Also pretty much all of my women friends have told me stories that range from creepy dudes following them to outright assaults. There's a reason why plenty of women are terrified of random men just coming up to them and hitting on them--because they don't know if this is going to be a situation they can walk away from.

To homeboy: You're not entitled to getting people's benefit of the doubt.

While I absolutely agree with you over GTKD, as a black guy I absolutely get dogwhistle vibes from this little bit as he did and I doubt you'd do that if his pfp wasn't of his own face.

Can we not sink to this, please?

[Cure Dragon 255]

This got out of hand REALLY FAST.

[WittyUsername]

So this is for you and Nagyzold, putting arranged marriages aside since those usually only happen within tight knit cultures and religious groups all those other situations require you to talk to someone you don't know. If you have crush on girl you don't have class with how do you expect to get to know her? You muster the courage to introduce yourself and start a conversation and you know what? she could reject you and say "Oh I don't come to school to get hit on", funny thing about that rejection line is that you could substitute "School" for any other place or platform ( Malls, Grocery Stores, Nightclubs, college cafeteria's, Tinder, Bumble, Instagram, a friend's barbeque, Comic Con etc) and it'll still apply. So Knowing that, how can you dictate what's an appropriate place or what isn't? You can't, because its all person dependent which is why you just have to wing it and take a chance if she says no cool, if she says yes great now you have date for Saturday night but again its not about LOOKING FOR DATES IN A PARTICULAR SPACE its about MEETING PEOPLE BY HAPPENSTANCE. I don't know why you guys are getting that part confused.

Well, I’ve never been in a relationship, so I wouldn’t know about any of the supposed nuances when it comes to this stuff. I just know that walking up to someone with the hopes of starting a relationship probably isn’t the best idea, unless you’re at a party or something. My personal view is that everyone would be better off if they kept to themselves whenever possible.

[jjgp1112]

I think we have to keep in mind that the majority of us are probably on the introvert side of the spectrum. Like say, a Gohan. He always keeps to himself unless he's patrolling the streets and protecting the citizens of Satan City.

[JulieYBM]

I used to think I was an introvert. Then I realized I was just trans, bi and neurodivergent. Lulz

[Peach]

Confidence is key...but it's not about walking in a room with your chest puffed out. People like that tend to be those with very low confidence and feel like they need to over compensate for that.


Basically its understanding that shit's not that serious. Maybe it'll lead to something, maybe it won't. But it doesn't matter. It's more about making social connections and just talking to someone. You also need situational awareness: knowing when and where is a good time to do something. That's why I don't recommend walking around grocery stores or malls trying to get a date. You might be thinking what you're doing is innocent and naive, but I guarantee that most people think you're being kinda creepy.

I mean we have so many different resources available that there's really no reason for any one to be doing stuff like that.

Thank you.

I've just been so lonely lately.

[Nagyzöld]

How do y'all think people met prior to the explosion of chat rooms, social media and dating apps?

From my experience - college, workplaces, friend groups etc. How do you think people met before dating apps?

So this is for you and Nagyzold, putting arranged marriages aside since those usually only happen within tight knit cultures and religious groups all those other situations require you to talk to someone you don't know. If you have crush on girl you don't have class with how do you expect to get to know her?

Then how do you have a crush on her if you don't know her in the first place? Except if only for her looks in which case let's call it what it is. Sexual attraction. No, don't go up to women on the street or in a grocery store just because you're sexually attracted to them. Most women just wanna buy that damn bread without random strangers letting them know they wanna have sex with them.

Besides, I didn't say you can only find a partner in school, I've also mentioned workplaces, friend groups, communities. Conversations start more naturally when there is a context behind and women can have a glimpse of who you are as a person. In opposition to just walk up to a total stranger and she has no damn clue whether you're a genuine guy or some sleazy creeper who if given the slightest attention he will follow her to her apartment and she gotta live in fear from now on.

Man I don't know what else to add here. There have been women in this topic confirming they don't like this kind of attention. There have been guys with stories from women. But you keep mansplaining to us how we're all wrong and it's totally ok to bother women in supermarkets. Guess in the end we'll just go on our ways and nothing will change in how everyone thinks or acts.

[dva_raza]

Not everyone wants to be hit on (or even just spoken to) just because they left the house.

LOL this is so true even for me and I'm not even particularly introverted, for me it's mostly that I hate the disruption. But for women and introverted people it must feel worse.
The thing about thinking it should be "flattering" its kinda like believing actors on the street should be flattered when randomly approached, when really they get so much of that "flattery" already that they would actually appreciate people left them in peace. For women it's kinda the same and I've heard it from many friends.
Having said that if goku the krump dancer mentioned having met tons of people in this traditional way, then he obviously knows how to do that and I think that's cool too

[PurestEvil]

This got out of hand REALLY FAST.

It's a thread about relationship advice in an ANIME forum. I'm surprised it didn't get even more scuffed.

[John Pannozzi]

I may as well vent a little about my dating experience.

For the record, I'm 35 and have Aspergers Syndrome. So dating doesn't come easy for me. I have only been in a few relationships, all very short lived (but amicable), and all within the last 5 years.
I feel that I have quite bad luck on dating sites and apps (OKCupid is the one I've used the most). Very rarely do I get responses from girls who I send messages to. I actually just joined SoulGeek after reading about it earlier in this thread, it's perhaps a bit too soon to judge my experience there, but so far, things ain't very fruitful.

Moreover, with the Coronavirus pandemic still going on, I now have very few chances to meet new people face-to-face.

With any luck, as the threat of COVID-19 finally goes down (Kami-sama), I'll have more opportunities to meet people and make friends.

And since its already been discussed here how a shared interest in Dragon Ball alone isn't a strong enough foundation, I will say that I tend to look for women who are more general geek/entertainment aficionados. And I'm especially interested in joining the acting world (which I have dabbled in previous), so I hope to meet interesting people that way.

[super michael]

This is my opinion but if someone is studying then it is best to avoid dating. The one dating could get jealous which can interfere in the studies if it involves group work. Long distant relationship can make a person lose focus on their studies and do poorly. This is worse if it is a group work and the whole team does bad.

[jjgp1112]

Yeah, you have to be diligent with your studies like Gohan, even if you don't have a Tiger Mom like Chi-Chi

[JulieYBM]

Imo you should ditch your studies and go do gay shit with a hot partner.

Anyway, don't bug women for a date or sex outside of designated areas for relationship-making.

Fun fact: I'm currently talking with a girl I met on Tinder. We've gotten to the point in our texting where we have discussed taxes.

[WittyUsername]

Maybe I’m just an insensitive asshole (that’s what I’ve been called on this very forum not too long ago), but I don’t understand why anyone should care so much about finding a relationship anyway. Don’t most relationships end with breakups/divorce anyway?

[JulieYBM]

Maybe I’m just an insensitive asshole (that’s what I’ve been called on this very forum not too long ago), but I don’t understand why anyone should care so much about finding a relationship anyway. Don’t most relationships end with breakups/divorce anyway?

My brain used to make me think this way before I got on HRT.

Anyway, the point of life is having someone who wants you to be the first and last person they speak to every day. Yes, I'm only speaking for myself.

Hey, maybe you're ace/aro?

[WittyUsername]

Maybe I’m just an insensitive asshole (that’s what I’ve been called on this very forum not too long ago), but I don’t understand why anyone should care so much about finding a relationship anyway. Don’t most relationships end with breakups/divorce anyway?

My brain used to make me think this way before I got on HRT.

Anyway, the point of life is having someone who wants you to be the first and last person they speak to every day. Yes, I'm only speaking for myself.

Hey, maybe you're ace/aro?

I’m not.

[JulieYBM]

Maybe I’m just an insensitive asshole (that’s what I’ve been called on this very forum not too long ago), but I don’t understand why anyone should care so much about finding a relationship anyway. Don’t most relationships end with breakups/divorce anyway?

My brain used to make me think this way before I got on HRT.

Anyway, the point of life is having someone who wants you to be the first and last person they speak to every day. Yes, I'm only speaking for myself.

Hey, maybe you're ace/aro?

I’m not.

So, you're not aromantic but you don't understand why people want to be in romantic relationships? So then you experience romantic feelings but don't understand why? Well, hell, who cares about the why of how that works?

Life's simultaneously incredibly short and long. It's nice to have someone (whether that be one or more people) to share it with. Or maybe feel a selfishness and want to be that special person to someone.

[WittyUsername]

My brain used to make me think this way before I got on HRT.

Anyway, the point of life is having someone who wants you to be the first and last person they speak to every day. Yes, I'm only speaking for myself.

Hey, maybe you're ace/aro?

I’m not.

So, you're not aromantic but you don't understand why people want to be in romantic relationships? So then you experience romantic feelings but don't understand why? Well, hell, who cares about the why of how that works?

Life's simultaneously incredibly short and long. It's nice to have someone (whether that be one or more people) to share it with. Or maybe feel a selfishness and want to be that special person to someone.

I’m (as far as I can tell) a heterosexual cisgender male. I just don’t think people need to spend so much time dwelling over whether or not they’ll ever find “the one” or what have you. There’s a bunch of other crap people have to worry about it in life, like paying the bills or not getting COVID.

[Skar]

Maybe I’m just an insensitive asshole (that’s what I’ve been called on this very forum not too long ago), but I don’t understand why anyone should care so much about finding a relationship anyway. Don’t most relationships end with breakups/divorce anyway?

I think it's something like 40% of marriages end in divorce but that could vary depending on the country. That shouldn't discourage anyone from trying to be in a relationship though. The reason we're all here is because previous generations built relationships and decided to have kids after all .

I used to be the same way and fine being single but sometimes you meet someone without having to look. I went to my cousin's graduation party a few years ago not planning on finding a girl or anything. She introduced me to one of her friends. We talked for a while to get to know each other and a few months ago we got engaged. She doesn't care much for anime and only familiar with old ones she watched as a kid but doesn't mind watching some together. It's not necessarily about sharing 100% of the same hobbies and mostly enjoying each other's company. There's no guarantee we'll be together for the rest of our lives but the only way to know is to give it a try.