Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

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Majin Hopo
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Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Tue Aug 04, 2020 5:40 am

Hello, people of the Kanzenshuu forums,

My name is Majin Hopo and I used to read through the episode discussions of Dragon Ball Kai and Super and other topics for years. I started to write my own Dragon Ball story last year that was always at the back of my mind. I had a structure ready with some key moments at the start, middle and ending, so I only had to flesh it out. It was a lot more challenging than I expected, but I really enjoyed writing every chapter in detail. It took around one hour for one every day for almost eight months since it has 180 chapters. I used a simple style to make it easier to write and it flows more like a fan-manga than fan-fiction.

Without further ado, I present you: DRAGON BALL HM!

The story is set 100000 years after Goku and Vegeta's exploits and humanity is the strongest race in the galaxy thanks to their influence. It however is divided in two factions honoring both godly Saiyans and it sometimes comes to wars between their views and mindset. Mato is the prince of the Vegeta empire and Hakuma is the daughter of Goku president, but they are in a secret relationship. They plan to run away from an arranged wedding, but both side are under attack of a powerful army from outside the galaxy. Hakuma and Mato flee to Namek where they learn about the dragon balls that are scattered in the galaxy to stop the army. They must complete tests to earn them, but the generals of the army are after them too who will use force.

You can read this finished saga on my DeviantArt page through these links: I also completed the second saga and I am now rereading it so discover typos, inconsistencies and other errors. It is just as long as the first saga and it raises tension even higher and it has a wider variety of tests. I will start to upload new chapters in September, so the people who are interested can finish the first saga without rushing. I plan to make a summary post every Sunday after I uploaded 3 chapters a day that week. I also used this method with the first saga, so you'll see the chapters in bundles of three. I hope you'll enjoy reading my thrilling Dragon Ball adventure with new characters.
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Majin Hopo
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Mon Aug 31, 2020 4:26 pm

I'm now finished with rereading the second saga of Dragon Ball HM and I'll take a short break from it this weak. I'll upload new chapters on Deviantart starting next Monday every day and I'll post an update in this topic every Sunday. I was hoping to get some feedback about the first saga last month to hear other people's opinions. Most online projects starts small and you need to make an impression to get noticed.
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Majin Hopo
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Sep 13, 2020 5:24 pm

It is time to start the second saga in Dragon Ball HM which gives Hakuma and Mato new rivals and enemies. As promised, I will summarize the chapters I have uploaded on Deviantart this week right here. I'll do this every Sunday after I have uploaded three chapters a day the same week.
I hope you'll enjoy reading this story and I'm waiting for your feedback.
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Majin Hopo
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Sep 20, 2020 5:04 pm

The story shifts to the tests for the dragon balls and those are based on other anime/manga series. I picked the most popular ones for several genres to make it more interesting and the names of the characters are parodies on who they reference. Here is the second batch of chapters for Dragon Ball HM.
I would like to know what you think about the tests.
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:24 pm

I have another batch of chapters ready for Dragon Ball HM. I could have made some tests longer, but I wanted to keep it 12 chapters for them all. That way both duos will have equal screen time, but some of them will be paced quickly. I'm waiting patiently for some replies.
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Majin Hopo
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Oct 04, 2020 5:12 pm

I'm here once more with the next batch of chapters for Dragon Ball HM. I once thought about giving Hakuma and Mato all the tests, but I wanted to develop Cory and Endi too. I tried to give them the tests that would suit them the best and they would learn the most from. I'm interested in your opinion about the tests.
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Majin Hopo
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Oct 11, 2020 5:32 pm

I'll have reached the first half of Dragon Ball HM with this batch of chapters. The tests are almost over and they have been the most difficult for me to write. I can finally go back to the regular pace and style of Dragon Ball where things are heating up even more. Get yourselves ready for the exciting second half.
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Oct 18, 2020 5:16 pm

It's time for my own favorite event in Dragon Ball HM in this chapter batch. The confrontation between the two duos is the climax of the tests and it will shift towards stopping Potata. I could have extended Cory and Endi's flashback, but I decided to keep it compact.
I'm curious about your favorite events of this and the previous saga.
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Oct 25, 2020 6:14 pm

We have finally reached the big turning point of Dragon Ball HM with this chapter batch. There are the two parent and child showdowns and both are defining moments. The duo ending up in these locations was one of the first plots I planned since I began with this story. Get ready for a big confrontation later down the line.
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Nov 01, 2020 6:32 pm

This chapter batch shows Hakuma and Mato reaching their final transformations. I wanted to show them going to Goku and Vegeta's time in the first saga for training, but I decided to feature it here. It was difficult to bring Whis' into the story with made up hax powers since he is interacting with my own characters. Get ready for the final arc for the next week.
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Nov 08, 2020 6:14 pm

We finally start the big war in this chapter batch of Dragon Ball HM. It has a standard set up with a battlefield that has four towers that Hakuma and Mato's allies need to destroy. I gave Cory and Endi the biggest challenge since they are the rivals and I wanted the old characters to have a comeback fight too. The final battle will finish the story next week.
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Re: Dragon Ball HM (Fan story)

Post by Majin Hopo » Sun Nov 15, 2020 6:19 pm

Here is the final chapter batch of Dragon Ball HM. I came up with the three artificial dimensions later on to give Hakuma and Mato a unique location to fight Potata in. I originally had the fusion split up in the middle of the second half of the fight, but that would be too similar like the previous final battle. I hope you enjoyed reading this story.
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