Dragonball: The Story Continues

Any general discussion regarding fan-created works of the Dragon Ball franchise, including AMVs, fan-art, fan-fiction, etc.
User avatar
Dr. Machismo
Banned
Posts: 991
Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2012 5:54 pm
Location: My dream garden!

Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by Dr. Machismo » Thu Jun 27, 2013 11:40 pm

A fanfiction (or if I'm lucky, fancomic) I've been working on. Here are some details about it.

*It starts where the manga left off and ignores GT. I will make sure it doesn't go anything established in Dragonball Online, though.
*In order to capitalize on Uub being Goku's successor, it will focus on Goku training Uub with assistance from Master Roshi, Pan, Korin, Piccolo, King Kai and the Yardrats. The comic will definitely end with Uub surpassing Goku in an epic battle.
*Uub's inner Majin self will overtake Uub and turn him evil at one point.
*Of course, Uub eventually comes to his senses. He and Majin Buu will briefly merge to defeat an enemy.
*Pan and Uub have a close relationship, much like brother and sister.
*Majin Buu creates Booby and they have a child together.
*Goten and Trunks go to the same high school (or University, still not exactly sure) and after graduating, they start a successful band called "Kamehameha". Eventually, the two get serious about fighting again and become swordsmen.
*Goten will be shown as an incompetent Great Saiyaman at one point.
*Gohan is one of Goten and Trunks' teachers at their high school (or University. Again, still not sure which one). And since Gohan's power was released past his limits by Old Kai, Gohan is the strongest unfused hero in the comic.
*Not wanting to stay behind Goku and potentially Uub, Vegeta leaves Earth to train elsewhere for a while. I'm also considering having Bulla tag a long with him. He will unlock his Super Saiyan 3 power and eventually returns.
*After learning of his father Dabura's death at the hands of Majin Buu, Beezlebub and his minions from Sand Land head to Earth to get revenge and challenge Majin Buu. They are defeated effortlessly. Eventually, they put their feud with Majin Buu behind and become great friends with him, occasionally watching TV, eating pizza and drinking beer with him and Mr. Satan. Their antics together, though, will lead to the release of the Shadow Dragons, beings created due to overuse of the Dragonballs. The Shadow Dragon saga will be obviously be very different than in GT and will be the final saga of the comic. Making the Dragonballs turn against the heroes in the final saga is perfect.
*So, this is basically how the story will be: We'll see Uub go through a good amount of his training, the demons attack Earth and fail, timeskip, conflict with the Shadow Dragons and the comic ends with Uub surpassing Goku.

Now, I think a lot of Dragonball fanfictions always have the problem of not being like something you'd expect Toriyama to make ... but I feel as if this right here is just as good as something Toriyama would put out, maybe even better actually! Can't say when I'll release any chapters from it though. Tips?
Last edited by Dr. Machismo on Thu Sep 12, 2013 6:41 pm, edited 6 times in total.
The world's greatest.

User avatar
dbzfan7
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 13045
Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 3:55 am
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by dbzfan7 » Thu Jun 27, 2013 11:58 pm

Dr. Machismo wrote:A fanfiction I've been working on. Here are some key features of it.

*It takes place right after the manga ended and ignores GT. I will make sure it doesn't go anything established in Dragonball Online, though.
*In order to capitalize on Uub being Goku's successor, we'll see Uub do many of the things Goku did. He'll receive training from Master Roshi, climb Karin's tower, train at God's Temple, train at King Kai's place, train at Planet Yardrat and I'm thinking about making him fight Baba's fighters. Uub would also become a villain at one point.
*Goten and Trunks go to the same high school and after graduating, they start an extremely successful band called "Kamehameha".
*Gohan initially is one of Goten and Trunks' teachers and later becomes a college professor.
*Not wanting to stay behind Goku and potentially Uub, Vegeta leaves Earth to train elsewhere.
*After learning of Dabura's death, a group of demons come to Earth to kill Majin Buu. Majin Buu beats them everytime, and the demons become a comic relief, challenging Majin Buu time after time. Eventually, the demons put aside differences they have with Majin Buu and become great friends with him, occasionally watching TV, eating pizza and drinking beer with him and Mr. Satan.

Now, I think a lot of Dragonball fanfictions always have the problem of not being like something you'd expect Toriyama to make ... but I feel as if this right here is just as good as something Toriyama would put out. I plan on posting chapter one soon. Tips?
I like this idea for the most part. I don't see why Oob would need to train with Muten Roshi or train at Gods temple (unless with Goku). I can see Oob climbing Korins tower maybe for some wisdom after Korin told him he has to climb the tower. Most of that training Goku already knows and would be well below Oobs level. I ain't against Goten and Trunks starting a band as it's odd. not sure where that idea would come from (same could be said about how they became crazy about women). I could see Muten Roshi making a joke about them wanting to use the Kamehameha name. Gohan being a professor seems right though it seems to be taken from AF (which isn't a bad thing at all). Vegeta training somewhere in space could bring some interesting mystery to where he goes and could lead to good things. I really like the idea of Majin Boo beating up other demons and hanging out with him afterwards.

All in All this could be good. Though I wouldn't say it would be something as good as Toriyama could do (don't get cocky) :thumbup:
Why Dragon Ball Consistency in something such as power levels matter!

User avatar
Dr. Machismo
Banned
Posts: 991
Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2012 5:54 pm
Location: My dream garden!

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by Dr. Machismo » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:03 am

Uub doesn't know how to control his power, so Goku could figure it would be a good idea to start from the basics. Not knowing where to start and wanting to make things interesting, he decides to get help from Master Roshi, Korin, Dende, Popo, Piccolo, King Kai and the Yardrats. Gohan also wrote the Groundbreaking Science in Dragonball Online, which seems professor-like.
The world's greatest.

User avatar
dbzfan7
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 13045
Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 3:55 am
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by dbzfan7 » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:07 am

Dr. Machismo wrote:Uub doesn't know how to control his power, so Goku could figure it would be a good idea to start from the basics. Not knowing where to start and wanting to make things interesting, he decides to get help from Master Roshi, Karin, Dende, Popo, Piccolo, King Kai and the Yardrats. Gohan also wrote the Groundbreaking Science in Dragonball Online, which seems professor-like.
It seems rather pointless when Goku is more than enough as a teacher to bring out Oobs power and help him control it. The most those other people can do is give Oob wisdom. Goku already knows everything those other guys know. He is more suited to teach Oob than any of those other people. It just seems like an uneeded way of trying to include more characters to bring back just for the sake of it. I only mention Gohan being a professor as that was his job in DBAF by Toyble. If you just came off that idea from DBO then I misunderstood the idea coming from DBAF. There is nothing wrong going in this direction for Gohan as it suits him.
Why Dragon Ball Consistency in something such as power levels matter!

User avatar
Dr. Machismo
Banned
Posts: 991
Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2012 5:54 pm
Location: My dream garden!

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by Dr. Machismo » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:17 am

dbzfan7 wrote: It seems rather pointless when Goku is more than enough as a teacher to bring out Oobs power and help him control it. The most those other people can do is give Oob wisdom. Goku already knows everything those other guys know. He is more suited to teach Oob than any of those other people. It just seems like an uneeded way of trying to include more characters to bring back just for the sake of it. I only mention Gohan being a professor as that was his job in DBAF by Toyble. If you just came off that idea from DBO then I misunderstood the idea coming from DBAF. There is nothing wrong going in this direction for Gohan as it suits him.
I don't see how Goku would know how to train someone from the top by himself. By from the top, I mean train someone with little to any knowledge or experience about fighting. In fact, I don't think he's ever done that. He trained Gohan in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber, but Gohan already had plenty of knowledge about fighting. I think Goku could have trained Pan, but he could have got help from others. Anyway, I personally think bringing back all these characters would be a good idea to give the impression that Uub is Goku's successor.
The world's greatest.

User avatar
dbzfan7
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 13045
Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 3:55 am
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by dbzfan7 » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:22 am

Dr. Machismo wrote:
dbzfan7 wrote: It seems rather pointless when Goku is more than enough as a teacher to bring out Oobs power and help him control it. The most those other people can do is give Oob wisdom. Goku already knows everything those other guys know. He is more suited to teach Oob than any of those other people. It just seems like an uneeded way of trying to include more characters to bring back just for the sake of it. I only mention Gohan being a professor as that was his job in DBAF by Toyble. If you just came off that idea from DBO then I misunderstood the idea coming from DBAF. There is nothing wrong going in this direction for Gohan as it suits him.
I don't see how Goku would know how to train someone from the top by himself. By from the top, I mean train someone with little to any knowledge or experience about fighting. In fact, I don't think he's ever done that. He trained Gohan in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber, but Gohan already had plenty of knowledge about fighting. I think Goku could have trained Pan, but he could have got help from others. Anyway, I personally think bringing back all these characters would be a good idea to give the impression that Uub is Goku's successor.
Because Goku already knows everything that the others taught him. He could probably replicate those teachings if he wanted to. You can have the others do that if you want but it feels un needed to me.
Why Dragon Ball Consistency in something such as power levels matter!

User avatar
Dr. Machismo
Banned
Posts: 991
Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2012 5:54 pm
Location: My dream garden!

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by Dr. Machismo » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:24 am

dbzfan7 wrote: Because Goku already knows everything that the others taught him. He could probably replicate those teachings if he wanted to. You can have the others do that if you want but it feels un needed to me.
He could have forgot. :D
The world's greatest.

User avatar
dbzfan7
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 13045
Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 3:55 am
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by dbzfan7 » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:29 am

Dr. Machismo wrote:
dbzfan7 wrote: Because Goku already knows everything that the others taught him. He could probably replicate those teachings if he wanted to. You can have the others do that if you want but it feels un needed to me.
He could have forgot. :D
You could write that in as a joke. But I still think that training from them is not needed. I think they fit the wisdom role a lot better. They can be Oob's gateway into Goku's past and inspiration for training hard like Goku.
Why Dragon Ball Consistency in something such as power levels matter!

User avatar
TheGmGoken
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 10592
Joined: Sun Apr 07, 2013 5:19 pm
Location: Capsule Corps

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by TheGmGoken » Fri Jun 28, 2013 1:26 am

Seems like Oob training with Karin,Muten, King Kai, and Yadrats is a bit over kill. I know he's Goku successor and all but he doesn't have to grow threw everything Goku did. That just makes him Goku V2. Which not exactly what a successor is. He might gain some similar traits but not a complete copy. Goku's a good teacher. I'm sure he know the basic and will teach oob everything he knows. Just like every master did to Goku. Then Oob will have to learn for himself. Hell only one who can give him wisdom is King Kai and Yadrat. Since Goku will past down his fighting wisdom. Great idea. But no where NEAR of what Akira will come up with. The plot for Goku and Oob needs some work to be honest. Once again seems like a re-write. For example imagine if there was a Pokemon Red 2 with Red's son. The plot is that Red's son is Red's successor. The story is just the same as Pokemon Red 1. That game would need MAJOR editing lol.

User avatar
Kamiccolo9
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 10374
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 9:32 pm
Location: Regensburg, Germany

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by Kamiccolo9 » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:05 pm

If I may make a suggestion, since Uub, even the first time we see him, is much, much stronger than any of Goku's teachers, have him slip up in restraining his power, and kill either Karin or Popo by accident. This would be a good way to start his fall into becoming a bad guy.
Champion of the 1st Kanzenshuu Short Story Tenkaichi Budokai
Kamiccolo9's Kompendium of Short Stories
Cipher wrote:If Vegeta does not kill Gohan, I will stop illegally streaming the series.
Malik_DBNA wrote:
Scarz wrote:Malik, stop. People are asking me for lewd art of possessed Bra (with Vegeta).
"Achievement Unlocked: Rule 34"

User avatar
TheMightyOzaru
Banned
Posts: 6255
Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 6:50 pm
Location: Capsule Corp

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by TheMightyOzaru » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:22 pm

Vegeta wouldn't leave Earth unless Bulma died :problem: .
Dr. Machismo wrote:
dbzfan7 wrote: Because Goku already knows everything that the others taught him. He could probably replicate those teachings if he wanted to. You can have the others do that if you want but it feels un needed to me.
He could have forgot. :D
That is completely unnecessary :? . Furthermore Uub becoming evil? Why?
Vegeta: "Funny... I seem to recall Kakarot being fed the same information right before he transformed; the distinct look on your faces when he went Super Saiyan didn't exactly inspire confidence. One does not predict or calculate power like ours."
Youtube channel:
http://www.youtube.com/user/ThePrinceOfSaiyajins
My 3DS Friend Code:
2707-1669-7946

User avatar
dbzfan7
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 13045
Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 3:55 am
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by dbzfan7 » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:40 pm

TheMightyOzaru wrote:Vegeta wouldn't leave Earth unless Bulma died :problem: .
Dr. Machismo wrote:
dbzfan7 wrote: Because Goku already knows everything that the others taught him. He could probably replicate those teachings if he wanted to. You can have the others do that if you want but it feels un needed to me.
He could have forgot. :D
That is completely unnecessary :? . Furthermore Uub becoming evil? Why?
I could see Vegeta going to train in space. And I can't believe I forgot about that other point. Oob becoming evil is kinda random.
Why Dragon Ball Consistency in something such as power levels matter!

User avatar
TheMightyOzaru
Banned
Posts: 6255
Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 6:50 pm
Location: Capsule Corp

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by TheMightyOzaru » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:49 pm

dbzfan7 wrote:I could see Vegeta going to train in space. And I can't believe I forgot about that other point. Oob becoming evil is kinda random.
For a bit, like a vacation of something, but he wouldn't leave for a long period of time. He still has a wife and a kid, maybe if this was the early Buu saga, he would leave, but this isn't the early Buu saga.
Vegeta: "Funny... I seem to recall Kakarot being fed the same information right before he transformed; the distinct look on your faces when he went Super Saiyan didn't exactly inspire confidence. One does not predict or calculate power like ours."
Youtube channel:
http://www.youtube.com/user/ThePrinceOfSaiyajins
My 3DS Friend Code:
2707-1669-7946

User avatar
dbzfan7
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 13045
Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 3:55 am
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by dbzfan7 » Fri Jun 28, 2013 1:12 pm

TheMightyOzaru wrote:
dbzfan7 wrote:I could see Vegeta going to train in space. And I can't believe I forgot about that other point. Oob becoming evil is kinda random.
For a bit, like a vacation of something, but he wouldn't leave for a long period of time. He still has a wife and a kid, maybe if this was the early Buu saga, he would leave, but this isn't the early Buu saga.
Well yeah he wouldn't leave for years. He cares for his family now.
Why Dragon Ball Consistency in something such as power levels matter!

User avatar
Dr. Machismo
Banned
Posts: 991
Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2012 5:54 pm
Location: My dream garden!

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by Dr. Machismo » Fri Jun 28, 2013 9:56 pm

Yeah, we have no canonical evidence to say that Vegeta would let his love for his family to get in the way of his training. Vegeta has never been shown to be that kind of parent. If Goku would abandon his family to train with Uub, why shouldn't it be hard to see Vegeta abandon his family to train? They're full blooded Saiyans, not ordinary people. And you can't say Vegeta would be neglecting his family by leaving to get stronger ... as he'd be benefiting the entire universe. And didn't Vegeta leave to train in Battle of Gods?

I also haven't specified how long Vegeta would be gone. As for Uub going evil, well, we all know that he is the reincarnation of Majin Buu. His Majin side could take over and turn him evil. Uub wouldn't be in full control. But he WOULD redeem himself and become a hero again. I also plan on having Uub kill Dende when he goes evil.
The world's greatest.

User avatar
TheGmGoken
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 10592
Joined: Sun Apr 07, 2013 5:19 pm
Location: Capsule Corps

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by TheGmGoken » Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:02 pm

Dr. Machismo wrote:Yeah, we have no canonical evidence to say that Vegeta would let his love for his family to get in the way of his training. Vegeta has never been shown to be that kind of parent. If Goku would abandon his family to train with Uub, why shouldn't it be hard to see Vegeta abandon his family to train? They're full blooded Saiyans, not ordinary people. And you can't say Vegeta would be neglecting his family by leaving to get stronger ... as he'd be benefiting the entire universe. And didn't Vegeta leave to train in Battle of Gods?

I also haven't specified how long Vegeta would be gone.
Vegeta would take Trunks to be honest. Sure in Battle of Gods Vegeta didn't go to the Party because he training but I'm sure it wasn't hardcore training. He didn't leve. He was still at capsule corps but just in the training room most likely. So he was at the part in spirit! For hardcore training I'm sure he would take Trunks with him. Being full blood Saiyans stop meaning things in the Boo Saga lol. Vegeta became more Human than Goku in that arc xD.

User avatar
dbzfan7
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 13045
Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 3:55 am
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by dbzfan7 » Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:04 pm

TheGmGoken wrote:
Dr. Machismo wrote:Yeah, we have no canonical evidence to say that Vegeta would let his love for his family to get in the way of his training. Vegeta has never been shown to be that kind of parent. If Goku would abandon his family to train with Uub, why shouldn't it be hard to see Vegeta abandon his family to train? They're full blooded Saiyans, not ordinary people. And you can't say Vegeta would be neglecting his family by leaving to get stronger ... as he'd be benefiting the entire universe. And didn't Vegeta leave to train in Battle of Gods?

I also haven't specified how long Vegeta would be gone.
Vegeta would take Trunks to be honest. Sure in Battle of Gods Vegeta didn't go to the Party because he training but I'm sure it wasn't hardcore training. He didn't leve. He was still at capsule corps but just in the training room most likely. So he was at the part in spirit! For hardcore training I'm sure he would take Trunks with him. Being full blood Saiyans stop meaning things in the Boo Saga lol. Vegeta became more Human than Goku in that arc xD.
Vegeta also doesn't like being around people. He prefers to be on his own.
Why Dragon Ball Consistency in something such as power levels matter!

User avatar
Dr. Machismo
Banned
Posts: 991
Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2012 5:54 pm
Location: My dream garden!

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by Dr. Machismo » Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:07 pm

TheGmGoken wrote: Vegeta would take Trunks to be honest. Sure in Battle of Gods Vegeta didn't go to the Party because he training but I'm sure it wasn't hardcore training. He didn't leve. He was still at capsule corps but just in the training room most likely. So he was at the part in spirit! For hardcore training I'm sure he would take Trunks with him. Being full blood Saiyans stop meaning things in the Boo Saga lol. Vegeta became more Human than Goku in that arc xD.
Vegeta's always been a hardcore trainer. He might have accepted that Goku was the better fighter, but that doesn't mean he became less of a fighter. Also, I'm confident that after seeing Goku leave to train Uub, Vegeta might have felt that he was being left in the dust and regained his motivation to beat Kakarot. The ending of the Kanzenban supports this.

Also, sometime in Dragonball Online, Goku and Vegeta left to settle their score, which would hints that neither of them gave up training. And Trunks isn't even all that into training. Oh, and Vegeta's Saiyan pride is showed in how he vows to be the next Super Saiyan God ... methinks. I haven't seen the movie :P
Last edited by Dr. Machismo on Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.
The world's greatest.

User avatar
TheGmGoken
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 10592
Joined: Sun Apr 07, 2013 5:19 pm
Location: Capsule Corps

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by TheGmGoken » Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:07 pm

dbzfan7 wrote:
TheGmGoken wrote:
Dr. Machismo wrote:Yeah, we have no canonical evidence to say that Vegeta would let his love for his family to get in the way of his training. Vegeta has never been shown to be that kind of parent. If Goku would abandon his family to train with Uub, why shouldn't it be hard to see Vegeta abandon his family to train? They're full blooded Saiyans, not ordinary people. And you can't say Vegeta would be neglecting his family by leaving to get stronger ... as he'd be benefiting the entire universe. And didn't Vegeta leave to train in Battle of Gods?

I also haven't specified how long Vegeta would be gone.
Vegeta would take Trunks to be honest. Sure in Battle of Gods Vegeta didn't go to the Party because he training but I'm sure it wasn't hardcore training. He didn't leve. He was still at capsule corps but just in the training room most likely. So he was at the part in spirit! For hardcore training I'm sure he would take Trunks with him. Being full blood Saiyans stop meaning things in the Boo Saga lol. Vegeta became more Human than Goku in that arc xD.
Vegeta also doesn't like being around people. He prefers to be on his own.
Different man.

User avatar
dbzfan7
Namekian Warrior
Posts: 13045
Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 3:55 am
Location: Earth
Contact:

Re: Dragonball: The Story Continues

Post by dbzfan7 » Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:12 pm

TheGmGoken wrote: Different man.
I wouldn't say so. Every time he is even in the same room as people he is always in the corner or distanced.
Why Dragon Ball Consistency in something such as power levels matter!

Post Reply