Fanmanga - another DBAF

[StarRot]

the transformation images of Ize are just a copy of the freezer 3rd and last form. And as we knowned before, his forms are not too much original, are just like Freeza, it could be more cool and different.

I figured that because Freeza is Ize's father, the fact that their forms look similar was done on purpose, as a nod to his parental roots.
After all, Freeza's second form looks like King Cold.

[Raykugen]

the transformation images of Ize are just a copy of the freezer 3rd and last form. And as we knowned before, his forms are not too much original, are just like Freeza, it could be more cool and different.

I figured that because Freeza is Ize's father, the fact that their forms look similar was done on purpose, as a nod to his parental roots.
After all, Freeza's second form looks like King Cold.

Well, yes, but, the final form, is not alike as the final form of Freeza, is like the 3rd form, and the fisrt form like the original form of Freeza...
Also, Ize's final form, is like Coola final form too, so, he could be more original doing something new, I know he's his son and all of that but, he's the main enemy, It could be more cool, if he could have been more original, like Coola

[tomac66]

Here is my edited version:

http://www.mediafire.com/?cts3v1c3s444q7w

[goku1234]

just awesome!! downloading it now thanks StarRot for uploading and scanning and tomac66 for edited!!!

[Leviathus]

Thanks for the scans and edit guys!

[Michsi]

Traced or not, I have to admit I find it pretty impressive art-wise.

But what keeps me from enjoying this is the plot....at some point I think even Toriyama realized how ridiculouse the power ups had gotten and here we get Gohan having not one but two in the same fight. I disagree with the notion that it was power-ups and SSJ forms that made DB popular but it seems that every fan story that is attempting to continue DB falls back on these elements. GT did the same and it did it pretty poorly IMO.
It's also pretty much what keeps me from really getting into DBM , the story isn't capitvating enough for me to justify the battles.

[StarRot]

But what keeps me from enjoying this is the plot....at some point I think even Toriyama realized how ridiculouse the power ups had gotten and here we get Gohan having not one but two in the same fight. I disagree with the notion that it was power-ups and SSJ forms that made DB popular but it seems that every fan story that is attempting to continue DB falls back on these elements. GT did the same and it did it pretty poorly IMO.

I agree with this, 100%
Endless power-ups are boring. I’d rather read a fan comic with good pacing, strong storyline and great character development … heck, even if there wasn’t many fights, I would still be happy if it had the previously mentioned.

(Also, yesterday my flickr got 8,549 hits, after posting those scans. Wow! I'm shocked.)

[Leviathus]

I have to admit I find it pretty impressive art-wise.

Yeah I love the artwork too, it's beautiful. But the usage of familiar poses of Freeza or Goku irks me a bit. Not that there's anything wrong with using poses as reference, but it really stands out in this volume IMO.

But what keeps me from enjoying this is the plot....at some point I think even Toriyama realized how ridiculouse the power ups had gotten and here we get Gohan having not one but two in the same fight. I disagree with the notion that it was power-ups and SSJ forms that made DB popular but it seems that every fan story that is attempting to continue DB falls back on these elements. GT did the same and it did it pretty poorly IMO.

I agree with this, 100%
Endless power-ups are boring. I’d rather read a fan comic with good pacing, strong storyline and great character development … heck, even if there wasn’t many fights, I would still be happy if it had the previously mentioned.

Exactly. I'm also kinda tired of that; the death of a beloved one is a reason to transform idea. It adds a bit of drama to the story.. but I dunno, it has been used a lot.

[StarRot]

Exactly. I'm also kinda tired of that; the death of a beloved one is a reason to transform idea. It adds a bit of drama to the story.. but I dunno, it has been used a lot.

It’s a hell of a clichéd theme.
That being said, as overused as it is, it can be done well – for example (spoilers for Claymore) in volume 11, Clare “awakens” in an attempt to save a comrade – this was a scene full of genuine tension and action, so you’re able to overlook the done to death nature of this trope.

But I don’t think this doujinshi was quite able to do that, sadly. It was just too fast, no pacing, no build up. Just, BOOM! “Pan is dead! Here’s SSJ5!” I can see what the author was going for, but in my opinion, it just fell flat.
Criticisms aside, I’m still quite enjoying this comic. I look forward to what happens next.

[Leviathus]

But I don’t think this doujinshi was quite able to do that, sadly. It was just too fast, no pacing, no build up. Just, BOOM! “Pan is dead! Here’s SSJ5!” I can see what the author was going for, but in my opinion, it just fell flat.

Yeah, he could have worked that out a little more.

Criticisms aside, I’m still quite enjoying this comic. I look forward to what happens next.

Yeah, same here

[Michsi]

I sometimes had problems telling SSJ4 Vegeta and SSJ4 Gohan apart . Thank god for Vegeta's widow's peak.

The story quality seems to be at a typical DBZ movie-level and it doesn't seem like it will be more than that for now. DB world has so much potential left open by Toriyama, it's sad to see that so many want to stay in the "safe zone" when it comes to the story.

[StarRot]

DB world has so much potential left open by Toriyama, it's sad to see that so many want to stay in the "safe zone" when it comes to the story.

Yes! There’s so much that could be written about … why must it always fall back to Vegeta and Goku? If people MUST write about Saiyans, why not Goten or Trunks? Or even movie characters, like Tullece?

My favourite kinds of DB fan stories are the kinds that are about minor characters, to be honest. I particularly like when people choose to write about their pasts, for example, when Yamcha was a bandit. Those kind of stories are fun and underused.

[Michsi]

DB world has so much potential left open by Toriyama, it's sad to see that so many want to stay in the "safe zone" when it comes to the story.

Yes! There’s so much that could be written about … why must it always fall back to Vegeta and Goku? If people MUST write about Saiyans, why not Goten or Trunks? Or even movie characters, like Tullece?

My favourite kinds of DB fan stories are the kinds that are about minor characters, to be honest. I particularly like when people choose to write about their pasts, for example, when Yamcha was a bandit. Those kind of stories are fun and underused.

Yes, although, aside from Goku, I'm not too fond of the saiyans and them taking over the story irked me a little. So I can't say I'd be that interested in story about Goten or Trunks ( unless they are paited up with Piccolo because I really love their dynamic ) but I do agree that there should be more fan stories that focuse on other characters. It's one of the reasons I started doing my own fan comic Heck , I even considered once doing a little one shot about Mr. Satan past....

[StarRot]

I’m not that fussed with Saiyans either, I just meant that if someone was to write about them, why not choose the Saiyans that are a little less represented in fanworks?

I love your comic, it’s so fun and different, a refreshing change to the power-level/power-up focused stories.

A Mr. Satan story would be amazing – especially if he was paired up with Buu. Wacky hijinks!

[Michsi]

I’m not that fussed with Saiyans either, I just meant that if someone was to write about them, why not choose the Saiyans that are a little less represented in fanworks?

I love your comic, it’s so fun and different, a refreshing change to the power-level/power-up focused stories.

A Mr. Satan story would be amazing – especially if he was paired up with Buu. Wacky hijinks!

Thank you, that's very kind of you

You know, Toriyama did say something about chosing Mr. Satan as his main character if he had ever decided to continue DB again ) At first I didn't like the idea because "Wait, what about Piccolo and Goku and all the others?? " But now I think it would have been fun.

Strangely I more interested in this new Bardock comic than I had anticipated (maybe it has something to do with the fact that it's the first serious DB story to come from an official source in years) but ironically, I know this will end in a power up + SSj form possibly via death of somebody he got attached too

[Michsi]

I’m not that fussed with Saiyans either, I just meant that if someone was to write about them, why not choose the Saiyans that are a little less represented in fanworks?

I love your comic, it’s so fun and different, a refreshing change to the power-level/power-up focused stories.

A Mr. Satan story would be amazing – especially if he was paired up with Buu. Wacky hijinks!

Thank you, that's very kind of you

You know, Toriyama did say something about chosing Mr. Satan as his main character if he had ever decided to continue DB again ) At first I didn't like the idea because "Wait, what about Piccolo and Goku and all the others?? " But now I think it would have been fun.

Strangely I more interested in this new Bardock comic than I had anticipated (maybe it has something to do with the fact that it's the first serious DB story to come from an official source in years) but ironically, I know this will end in a power up + SSj form possibly via death of somebody he got attached too

[Leviathus]

but ironically, I know this will end in a power up + SSj form possibly via death of somebody he got attached too

Yeah, I'm afraid that will happen too I hope Ooshi will come up with an original or, at least, different reason to make Bardock transform.

[ssjkarolia]

toyble's dbaf and youngjijii's dbaf
their ssj5 is similar
i konw toyble's dbaf is earlier than youngjijii's dbaf
but i want to konw
is the ssj5 model created by toyble first ?

[Herms]

is the ssj5 model created by toyble first ?

No, Toyble's SSj5 design is based off of an anonymous image of SSj5 Goku that's been kicking around for years and helped fuel the AF rumors that both doujinshi are more or less based on (you can see the image in the Daizex Rumor Guide). So the design came before either doujinshi. Though in the info section at the end of volume 3, Young Jijii talks about being inspired by a "certain doujinshi artist" to make his version , so it's possible he was influenced by Toyble

[Raykugen]

It's very funny but, the "famous" image of Goku ss5

Appeared on a magazine from spain, a videogame magazine, named "Hobby Consolas" in the 1997 or 98 (I can't remember). I can ensure you, that what I'm talking about it's true, because I'm spanish xD. These image, was sent by a lector of the magazine on the comment and question section. It's very funny to know that Dragon Ball AF has his origin on Spain by a guy who sent a drawing to a videogame magazine. I would want to know if he knows what he did xDD.
And I think that's NOT goku ss5, I think he's Vegetto ss4, because, the image, with more quality, has got Pottala earings, and about the colour, it's just different, like Gogeta ss4, so I'm pretty sure is Vegetto.
That's a very EPIC FAIL from toyble, this other guy and other fanarts xD